I Want To Be Perfect

  I’m never enough for you, I try my best and I fail miserably.  My best will never be enough, no matter how hard I try.  And as I stand with arm wrapped around my stomach, the other extended upwards to my mouth, two fingers ready to work, I think of the words you say “Your so rude, and disobedient” and the little voice in my head says, “Really? I call this obedience”.  Later when I lay in bed and my stomach screams in agony as it has not a morsel of food inside to ease the pain I remember again your words, “You never try hard enough, you don’t know what a sacrifice really is” and yet the voice in my head retorts “I call this a sacrifice, and as my head was half way in the toilet I tried pretty hard.” You don’t know the half of it, you think you do, you don’t.  I don’t play by your little rules so you think I am rebelling, I’m not, I want to be perfect more than you realize. 

lehu349 lehu349
13-15, F
Mar 9, 2010