Finally Found The Perfect Guy But I Am Worrying

I finally found the man of my dreams. I have never met a man with so many things in common like this: our values, lifestyle preference, long-term goals align so perfectly. He would be a 9 on the compatibility scale. I know this is rare so I'm holding onto him but I have dated him for 2.5 months already and still feel zero chemistry. There's just no spark for me to motivate me to move the relationship to the next level. However, I did just got out of a serious relationship a few months ago and my guard is up. I hope I sort out my feelings soon. I don't want to lead him on and I don't want to lose him. I just realize I can't force myself to get over a break up. I have to allow myself to ride through all the pain and stages of grief. It's so annoying; I'm ready to move on but my emotions won't let me.
amaryllis08 amaryllis08
1 Response Feb 22, 2013

Isn't that funny how we work? You need to step back from the new relationship. Why don't you just tell him you need some time to regroup? Yes, you will "risk" losing him, but really, you have nothing to lose since you don't have any sparks. I did what you are doing 22 years ago, and I will say it was a huge mistake. I'm married 2 kids with her, the youngest is still 15, but I have no sparks for her and never really did. Let me be your example of what not to do. Living this long with no sparks and longing for one takes its own toll, even if everything else in your life is great. Trust me

From the folks who has been there done that there's an overwhelming number of advice to walk away. I just need to have faith that I will find both the chemistry and compatibility in one person some day. Thanks DhataDsata.

Yes, you will find it all. First, you must get over the past relationship, and be happy being single. Good luck.

D. . . it's as if I am reading my situation to yours. Without that "spark" nothing can be right. I live for my kids, that keeps that side of my life aspire for things still not visible.