Why Does It Have To Be This Intense?

Why do I have to feel things so intensely? Like I have mental headphones on that are turned up to the max? And why do I have to bottle it all up? So I don't bother other people, evidently. It just offends and annoys people when you vent your frustrations or your feelings. So I keep it to myself, and the intensity just goes off the scale. If you read this and it makes sense, I have no idea how that happened given I'm just on one of my inane rambling sessions.
kiuz645 kiuz645
31-35, M
6 Responses Jul 16, 2010

can totally relate. I appear passive to others, mostly to keep them happy. But inside I'm bursting and just wondering when/if I will ever blow. You sure aren't alone

this makes sense to me, sometimes i have days where i want to feel everything and just cry, vent and sometimes i hide all my feelings which only makes them harder to deal with, in a sense a double edged sword.

It's like what a late thirty-something, non-traditional grad-student at the College of Willam and Mary said to me once when I asked him what he meant by saying that I was much more intense than most people (and other students) he's come across--he said, "Your volume is turned up louder than most...." The simple answer is, if you are bipolar then you have a chemical imbalance in your brain (serotonin, dopamine, etc.), and most likely you will have to seek medical intervention to correct this imbalance thru the use of antidepressants and/or antipsychotics. Also, treatment tends to work best when meds are combined with talk therapy with a psychologist or a LCSW (licensed clinical social worker), which is longhand for a therapist. Since you are already a member of this experience group, I assume that you already know more or less what I am talking about. Good luck to you.

i have let my roommate who has bipolar that its ok when he gets angry i just cant always promise not 2 get mad back cause he brings what ive havent stop getting mad about he forces me to deal w my own anger then i can be more patient when he gets mad our anger isnt in control of our lives we have good people praying 4 us i pray GOD brings you kind n patient people into ur life BE BLESSED i know i am

I totally get it. I feel the same

Oh my I definately understand you here, p-lease don't feel alone!