I Suffer From Chronic Pain
I had an appointment to see a neurosurgeon late January to see if there was anything he could do to help. The first thing he did was review my MRI with me in great detail. I wasn't quite sure what he was leading up to but I listened attentively.
After a full (unnecessary) neurological exam he sat me down and delivered the news that he knew long before I walked into his clinic. There's nothing he can do to help me surgically. My entire cervical spine is badly degenerated, not just the few discs we had originally thought, and surgery to replace the discs would be useless as he'd never know which ones were causing me pain. I asked if he could not replace them all at once (daunting, but still...it seems possible) and he said that it would be too much for my body to recover from. The only other option would be scheduled surgeries to replace them as fast as the others degenerate.... futile, I realize. It's like trying to fill a bucket with a hole in the bottom. (There's a hole in ma bucket, dear Liza dear Liza...)
So. My pain has been taken down to three sources. Bone pain from the degeneration, nerve pain from the nerve roots that are being squashed between collapsing vertebrae and muscle pain from my seized muscles. I don't think my shoulder muscles have ever relaxed in my entire life.
He gave me other meds to try. More meds. My life quality is now dictated by the amount and timing of the meds I put into my system. I take eight different pills in the morning now, four at noon, four at supper...sometimes four at bedtime.
I'm kind of afraid to say it...but it looks like this is my life. I'm not even 40 yet. :S Makes me a little leary of what 60 will look like.
(one day at a time one day at a time one day at a time).
After a full (unnecessary) neurological exam he sat me down and delivered the news that he knew long before I walked into his clinic. There's nothing he can do to help me surgically. My entire cervical spine is badly degenerated, not just the few discs we had originally thought, and surgery to replace the discs would be useless as he'd never know which ones were causing me pain. I asked if he could not replace them all at once (daunting, but still...it seems possible) and he said that it would be too much for my body to recover from. The only other option would be scheduled surgeries to replace them as fast as the others degenerate.... futile, I realize. It's like trying to fill a bucket with a hole in the bottom. (There's a hole in ma bucket, dear Liza dear Liza...)
So. My pain has been taken down to three sources. Bone pain from the degeneration, nerve pain from the nerve roots that are being squashed between collapsing vertebrae and muscle pain from my seized muscles. I don't think my shoulder muscles have ever relaxed in my entire life.
He gave me other meds to try. More meds. My life quality is now dictated by the amount and timing of the meds I put into my system. I take eight different pills in the morning now, four at noon, four at supper...sometimes four at bedtime.
I'm kind of afraid to say it...but it looks like this is my life. I'm not even 40 yet. :S Makes me a little leary of what 60 will look like.
(one day at a time one day at a time one day at a time).
By:
Whym
Age:
36-40
,
Female
