It's My Get Away...

I have suffered from Maladaptive Daydreaming (md) for about 7 years but it didn't get to its peak until about 5 years ago. Although I have always...I guess some people would say "lived in my own little world" I never thought of it as an obsession until I was about 13 and it got really bad. I daydream about a lot of things, to many to mention. A lot of people don't know what MD is. It is over-excessive daydreaming. It's like an addiction, like drugs and alcohol. It interferes with you day to day living and its very hard to control. It messes with your sleep as well for some people like myself. I can easily lay in bed at night and daydream for hours and hours and lose out on a lot of sleep. Its not just something that happens at night tho. It can happen anytime or anywhere no matter who or what is around. One thing I have found is that once you've started it is very very hard to stop. A lot of people with md daydream for hours and hours with no problems, except not getting things done. Md is just recently being acknowledged and studied. Nobody knows what causes it yet and there are not't any real medications that are specifically for md. There are lots of triggers that can make you start daydreaming. My biggest one is music. Every time I hear music I just start daydreaming. My next biggest one is being alone. I pretty much daydream all the time unless I am sleep then I just dream.  I daydream when I shower, when I am in a car, alone, listening to music, watching TV, cleaning, working, doing school work, spending time with my family...really just most of the time. I know I have said negative things about md but there are good things that come with it to. A lot of people with md..I'd say most of them are very creative and have some sort of an outlet  for that creativity. Some people paint, some people make music, and some people write. I used to write and it was very easy for me to fill up composition journals with 50-100 words on a line because I write very small. I stopped daydreaming for a little while but then got back into it but havn't written much since. Anyways I would like to say if anyone has any questions for me about MD then just let me know and I will do my best to answer them for you. Thank you for reading and have a great day.
blownaway20 blownaway20
18-21, F
51 Responses Nov 27, 2010

I'm 16 years old I only realized a few years after daydreaming that it was a problem and affecting my daily life. It happens ALL THE TIME! From the moment I wake up to when I go to sleep, the only time I don't is when I'm with someone and interested in the conversation or activity we are doing, otherwise I space out and daydream.

I have two main characters I daydream about, they are real people but I've never met them. I'm always one of these characters and spending time with the other, and I have many more characters in my daydreaming stories from different movies or books. I'll have different plots from different movies or make them up myself and put these characters in them.

I've even acted them out sometimes physically, like grimacing, cuddling my own pillows or just pretending they were right beside me in real life. It's like having an imaginary friend that's exactly what you want, I mean no one could compare to how special my characters are, I could cry if I imagine them in a sad story or something. Not as often I imagine being in pain or tortured or heartbroken. I don't mind them even though I should be worried because sometimes it feels nice crying cause I don't do it often.

It most likely started when I was 12 or 13 because around that time I was very depressed and angry for a long time. I would cry and punch things and even a few times I would think of my own death. I'm better now because I've got one good friend in my life and she also daydreams, she said it started when her parents left her alone for long period of time when she was young.

I know there's people who view this as a gift or something that helps their creativity or something but some people think it deters them from their full potential in life. I myself like the comfort and the happiness I can receive from fantasizing but sometimes get worried about how much time I spend or if I'm going crazy. I don't even know how to think if I'm not daydreaming, I don't even remember how I thought before this? Like how do people just fill their heads with other things and I can't even spend a few hours without thinking of my characters.

I'm lonely a lot and I need them to be 'there' beside me and understand what I'm going through. **** I'm really stressed about the future, my grades are okay (except for math) but that's because I'm good at remembering things, I never do my homework at all if the teacher doesn't collect it. I'm really bad at assignments cause I spend the time daydreaming. And I feel bad for my friends at lunch because while they are socializing I'm daydreaming. What am I supposed to do when choosing a university or college? I have no idea about my future because I have no hobbies besides watching tv, listening to music and reading, I just daydream. If I do get in some school I'm going to be away from my parents and then there will be no one to remind me to do my work or eat or shower or do laundry. It's pathetic I know but i just want to lay in bed all day. I don't want to get a job either cause it'll take up my time to daydream.

Sorry for writing a lot but this is the first time I've talked about this and realized there was so many people like me (besides my friend only once a year ago).

I don't see how I can find the trigger for my daydreams as the only time it doesn't happen is when I enjoy time with someone. I can't just spend 100% of my days with other people so how will I turn this off? I'm not a meditation/prayer/mindful person, I find that method useless for me. Are there any medications that help with this!?

just seems like my story .So what basically u do to control daydreaming.

I thought i was the only one addicted to daydreaming.From my childhood i would go to sleep early just to dream and fantasize,i would even compose my own sad story and just im in college it was only from the past few years that i have this md daydreaming..i tried my best to control but i couldnt control it..its ruining my days,my study,my life..i use to be very brilliant student..but now im one of the worst student ..i dont know what to do with this..i am also having depression

hey! It's not only u . I too used to be a brilliant student once and now just an average one. Don't let daydreaming harm u, nurture it as a gift to u . I can understand your situation, Last year i too had depression. Relax! there is nothing to depress, its all in our mind,its all illusion. Start reading something optimist,it will help.

I just found out about this today. Spent the whole day reading up on it. I can't believe there are others doing this. I've done it for 25 years I started a day dream and its evolved over the years. Even becoming emotionally attached to the make believe characters. I've leant to do normal activities whilst daydreaming. I feel it's like a choice of drug for an addict. Some use heroin I use daydreams to take me away from reality. I think I'm going to try quit! Thx everyone for posts and for this page.

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I can totally relate to this. It's been 3 years and I'm suffering from MD. It hampers with my day to day activities to a large extent. I couldn't even study for my exams. Its depressing and devastating once you realize what you are suffering from.
Need help to combat it as soon as possible

I am a psychotherapist who just came across this disorder by accident while researching OCD for a patient.

I have been sear hung the past few hours on MDD and am realizing this has been a major part of my life for nearly 40 years. I always knew my imagination was far more active than anyone else I knew; the few times I tried to talk about it were awkward failures. I have also been living with Bipolar 2 since the age of 8, and always assumed it was related to that... But my career as a therapist wouldn't allow me to accept that connection.

I have always thought there was something more intensely wrong with me and so always kept this secret, because I have been able to maintain my success. I have also been very creative and artistic, which both feeds and diffuses my DD.

I have always felt so very alone and ashamed of what I thought was an inability to relate to the real world. This is a paradigm shift for me personally and professionally.

Hey, I'm 14 years old, and I've only just found this post. I think I've had this since I was about 9, but I could really do with some advice from anyone else who has been through this. I'm worried that I have something wrong with me, I pace, and talk to myself whenever I'm in the middle of one, and people have started noticing.
Music often triggers it, but so do books, or films...I've been a complete loner until a couple of months ago, but now that I have two really good friends, it has started again, even more strongly then before, and always features those two.
But this is the ****ed up part....the day dreams quite often involve me getting injured, quite badly sometimes. I'm don't know what the hell is wrong with me...I've read posts where other people have imagined themselves being perfect, or good at everything, but none of this applies to me. What is wrong with me? Do I need to see someone about this????

I have it to. :( it makes me feel happy

Hi, i'm 14 years old, and i think i've been daydreaming for longer than i can remember... Since i was old enough to think, i guess. But i never knew it was a disorder until recently. I just... Is it bad? I'm scared. I can never focus on anything for long and it is destroying my life. I want to write everything down, but i can't even do THAT. I daydream all the time, in the car, at school, during meals, showers, during actual CONVERSATIONS(although i try to avoid them so i can daydream more intensely, it is frustrating). I just realised how, lately, i have begun subconsciously imitating my characters gestures, sometimes even mouthing their lines, and these daydreams get in the way of everything! How can i make them stop? I mean, i don't think i could actually cope with their abscence... My fictional worlds and stories and characters are more real than anything else to me already, and it scares me. I use my characters to deal with all my pent-up emotions, all the lack of socialization, i am dead scared of talking to people or being around them because i know how weird i am, everyone tells me that, i just... Don't know what to do. I have an important exam this summer... And i can't concentrate. But i'm so sad and my daydreams are the only things that can make it better, yet also the things that make it worse... I don't know what to do, i'm depressed and scared and i wish i could disappear forever in my little universes. In my books. I love reading. I love words. And i love my characters. But i want to concentrate for my exam... I'm just so alone. I know i'll never be happy with someone because the real people i know can never live up to the people in my dreams, even though some of my characters are actually BASED on these real people. What do i do?

the only time a daydream is when I'm moving, mostly anyway. You should try to make a schedule, like for example I let myself daydream before I go to sleep for as long as I want (mostly around three hours), on the way to school and sometimes when I watch series if I want to. I try to never daydream when I'm amongst people, (if they are boring it can happen anyway, but I try to concentrate and listen to what they are saying) or when I'm studying. fill your brain with other stuff so that you don't have a chance to daydream and can concentrate. when I study I always try to think "this is fun and interesting" (even though its not). Set limits, and train your brain when and where you are allowed to daydream.

and what you said about people not being able to live up to your characters, i totally get that. but since i know my characters through and through they become predictable in some ways, you know how they think and how they will react to things. But people can me unpredictable, my friends for example think differently from me and give me different perspective on things, there funny to and since I think a lot (I don't only make up story's) I can often share my toughs with them. It helps talking about it, and its interesting to since my toughs can be pretty random.

So all you have to do is find people that you can have fun with, and try not to compare them with the people around you. other alternatives are activity, sports, art ecs.

First of all just do relax. U are just 14 and u got your whole life ahead(high school,college) and everything is going to be alright.
Look daydreaming is not at all bad. Most of the successful people in the world are daydreamers but they have made a balance between it and their work. If you want to get rid off your daydreaming, Just start accepting the things the way they are. Ur friends,relative , exam n all. We all got some patterns in our daydreams just u need to figure it out what is it that trigger ur daydreams and should started working on it.
As in my case its movies,fictions and fantasies. So,start writing them somewhere ,whatever u think and where u are. write it down what u think. this will relax u and u will be able to decide is that thought worth keeping.
I too got "fit in "problem. U need to understand this gift of daydreaming is rare and u ,me v are unique to be gifted with it. Dont fall for average mind people. see what u are passionate about and make it ur priority(study, sports,music ,dance etc, writing).
Do more work and think less. U know what u dont need to go to people to have their company, people like u will itself form groups with u,not now but definately later in life.

For now just daydream for once how u want ur life to be like after 4 years and forget about everything else. work on u,its u who have to help urself.
stay strong and dont give Up!! All the best.

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today is the first time I am hearing the term "MD" ,seems like i am having it for 20+ years. Symptoms are the same you have described. I think it is a bit of problem but definitely not something you should take medicine for. Things that we can do to reduce it is never try to snap out just ease out when you find yourself doing it, try to paint the scenario or put it down in words . Every time I try to do a "hard reset" it is stressful. Now whenever I find myself doing it I just laugh at myself and try to think of it as a funny thing , this is helping me a lot .
Maybe this is a tremendous gift of creativity , I mean seriously how many people can create complex worlds , weave intricate plots , fashion alternate realities ,fantasy characters , roleplays in a fraction of a second in their heads and yet can tell difference between reality and imagination , but like every powerful ability this too comes with a big catch and we are left wasting a huge amount of time and real world experiences not to mention hating the real life .
PS: Sorry for the rant and bad grammer. It feels so amazing to read stories similar to mine and I say this from the bottom of my heart , I love you guys and hope we find inner peace.

how do you get over it.....if it gets out of control..

i have the same problem sort of....sometimes when i am alone or cleaning my room i pretend these imaginary fairy people are my friends and i have powers and i am a designer i know they aren't real it stopped for a while and then it came back...i know its kinda lame....i have a lot of friends but they aren't always over so yeah.....and when i was feeling sad i would tell those people what happened and i imagined they comforted me......but from this i discovered i love drawing and writing....i am not that good but improving

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Thanks for sharing your story, quite taken aback to see that it's almost reflection of my life!
Kindly share the most important aspect.... how you have overcomed the situation and what should we do now to focus back on our real life and restart our life .....

I just had a really weird night and I started to look up why I keep doing these things like pretending and imagining things that small children do... I didn't realize their where other people like me that suffered too. It makes me feel less crazy and less alone :)

I have a simular problem. The thing is I don't like my daydreams, they are about horrible things. I only get them at night, before bed. And once they start they don't stop. When I finally fall asleep, they turn into nightmares. When I wake up I get a break. I wake up late because I don't get sleep with them. Please Help!

I feel your pain I sometimes have these types of daydreams. I watch American Horror Story and couldn't sleep for days I thought I was going crazy. Its like the monsters that you see on television etc., your mind tricks you into believing they are your monsters and that they are going to hurt you. Its weird because I logically understand that isn't true that the stories in my head are not true but it feels so real. Just know you have a friend if you need one :) Keep your head up!!!

I have it too, it started a little after my parents divorced, then when my house burnt done it went out of control. I go into a world as I swing on a swing and pretend it's okay. Or I pretend people or characters from a movie, game, etc. are with me and I interact with them but I change my appearance a little bit. This can go on for hours. Am I crazy?

I daydream a lot, sometimes my feelings get involved sometimes cry for my character it weird. Like my personality change like I become the character. I try to stop but the character would still be in my head so I write turn it into a helps I think or maybe it makes it worse not sure. Thanks for your story I thought I was the only one.

ill be putting another post on here'll be about how I started managing my MD better and I'm hoping it helps some of you to start managing your MD.

I'm pretty sure I've suffered from this since about third grade, when my mom was severely depressed and my parents had a lot of problems. However, it became terrible when they finally divorced. I couldn't control it anymore, I would go outside with my ipod and swing on our swing set from 4 (when i got home from school) to 9 or 10 at night when I would go to sleep. Everyday. Even when temperatures dropped to below 10 degrees, i would bundle up and go daydream. I needed my daydreaming so badly, I would do anything to be able to swing and listen to music. This was a huge gateway to my problems academically and socially all throughout high school. Entering freshman year, instead of swinging, I would lock myself in my room and bounce on a yoga bouncing ball while looking in the mirror and listening to music. I have lost so much time with my family and friends because of it, I want more than anything for this daydreaming I have to go away. I had terrible study skills all throughout high school, I never focused or did my homework because I was too busy day dreaming in my room alone about **** that didnt matter. My grades suffered for it, as did my self respect. All my time was spent daydreaming. My daydreams were mainly me being great at everything, being really popular, having really good grades, everything perfect in my life. Now, I was not super unpopular, nor did I have terrible grades (except a D freshman year in geometry because I NEVER did my homework, too busy daydreaming) and my friends felt like a burden to me because i found my daydreaming to be more fun than spending time with them. Relationships with everyone in my life, especially myself have suffered because of this. Sooo what happened when senior year came around? College applications were a *****. What else can you expect for someone who's spent the last 4 years living in la la land while everyone else was learning math, science, history and things that would help them in the world. I feel like I never reached my full potential due to my daydreaming and now that I'm about to go to college (thank God a University saw potential in me) it needs to STOP. I cannot handle it anymore, I want to live in the real world with people not in my head where its NOT REAL. I want a life. I've narrowed my two main triggers down: 1. Music 2. Social Media (facebook primarily). But seriously, if anyone out there has successfully beaten this thing, where i dont live because im daydreaming all the time, help me!!!!!! oh and sorry for the novel, i had to get it out

Its been 3 days i am trying to stop day dreaming..
its kinda hard some time watching TV triggers day dream but i tried to control ..had few relapse but in middle found me day dreaming.. i always felt something is wrong with me .felt suicidal all the time
now i had left my studied i be 25 in 2 months and hadn't achieved a single thing
have no friends.. literally if i look at me i feel disgusting.. i m sick of all this..
most of time i sleep or watch TV.. or eat

Me too, I just sit,eat,sleep, and course take care of hygenie but I lonely most of the time I mean I have siblings but they say I am weird. They got there family I got no friends, or relationship i,'be been daydream since I was five I started my own world it changed and got more realistic over time that when my feeling got involved. Sometime when I am depressed I got to be careful cause my imagination makes up dangerous images (what if this would happen). I am 24 so don't feel so bad your not alone poojan :) our minds is just more creative then most it almost dangerous. :) I like it.

I have been daydreaming since childhood but as years go by the worse they get and im almost 20. I have tried to stop and actually have succeeded for about a month or two! Ok I had a few relapses but I didn't do it everyday. How? Mega self-control and prayer. But I think we all can agree that if we get to the point of fed up we can give ourselves a break. But it never truly stops. It's always in the back of my mind and the strong craving to daydream pulls me and sometimes I've cried cause it was so hard not to so I give in. I've been lonely, overwhelmed with life and the ache of anxiety just keeps me locked into my dreams. I have creativity to write and see things at an angle that many do not see and I know dreams are a factor in me having that ability. But to me that is not a pro. I want these dreams gone but I think we all can agree that when your not dreaming its like your mind is silent and I'm never comfortable with that feeling either. I think how can I live with not seeing and hearing all this in my head? I feel like an ordinary person, and I don't know how to live that way since MD sets me apart from everyone else and most importantly it is my escape to this world that I know I will never fit into. Some think MD is for those who had a traumatic childhood but that is not the case with me. I have great parents, amazing friends, and a balanced social life. But it is what I feel inside that no one can comfort (which I'm never really sure what that is) that keeps me going to dream because when I dream my world isn't as bad anymore then when I stop the reality is just as I left it so I must do it again.

i think this day dreaming syndrome was caused due to being lonely for so long. i practically live in my world and i often feel belonged in my dreams. some of my dreams are helping friends and family and changing this world to a better place. nonetheless i dream of being rich, so i could get out of this miserable life and travel the world.
my day dreaming starts practically when I sleep, i guess its because that's the only time I'm alone without any distraction. i try to control it sometimes, although its difficult. I'm also suffering from lucid dreaming which makes the process even harder. i don't want my life to drift away from reality, coz you will become more vulnerable when you had to face an unfortunate incident. Day dreaming is healthy for a creative mind and it will help you research for information and shed light to some new avenues of thinking for remedy.

Hi :)
Like most of the other people here i too ( i think) suffer from this..
i always day dream about being the umm.... alpha-male of sorts :s its hard to type this out but i kinda make up situations in my head where i am the hero for instance if i see a soccer player score a goal on TV, i'd make up a story about how im this player who pulls off some crazy skills and scores a goal and everybody cheers etc etc.. i know it sounds reeeally stupid but i'm really frustrated with my inability to control this and there are many other instances as well, i hope you understand what i'm talking about

how do you think i should go about this? i mean i heard most people with MD have a traumatic past, mine isn't so! i have lovely parents and an amazing bunch of friends
... does that make my case worse ? :s

pleeease help i'm just 18 and i will be going to college in a few months and desperately want to leave this **** behind

Little of daydreaming is not maladaptive and I think this is your case. At some point of time everyone dreams of some fantasy and daydreams like your are perfectly normal everyone dreams of being the hero at some point.
we, the people with MD case is lot worse and different. You can read the stories around here to get what I am trying to say.

I might suggest you to let be. You are perfectly normal. Little daydreaming is quite healthy in mundane lives and also act as a motivation.

Santaclaus - you don\'t say how often you daydream, but you do say that you have no control over it and you are \"desperate\" to leave it behind. To me, that really indicates that you do have a problem.

We humans have a tendency to deny we have problems, especially with something that gives us escape, release and pleasure (the way daydreaming does.) the fact that you yourself feel that there is something wrong is probably the best indication that there is an issue. Trust your instinct.

PS - I have very similar fantasies to you. That I am a rock star, or a Nobel Prize winner, or pull off an amazing performance at the Olympics. I suspect that this is not uncommon for some people with MD.

Even I have got a knack for writing. Writing poems since very young age. I write excellent articles and speech my teachers highly appreciate me.
I woud love to maintain more contact with you so we can discuss further.

I am new to the group. Please read my story also I am aound your age. Just turned 17. It has been worse for me since few years. It was there since childhood but past years have been a torture. It has taken away my 'present'

Hi. I am really sorry I haven\'t replied to you yet. I\'m not on her a lot anymore. If u still would like to talk message me.

Music is a big trigger for me too. In school one of my teachers sometimes plays music whilst we are working which is a bad move for me because I just drift off into my fantasy world, especially if its a male singer. That may sound unusual as I'm a girl that when I daydream my 'character' if you like, is always a boy. I'm not sure if anyone else is the same but maybe its because I'm trying to get as far away from reality as possible.
This post was a really interesting read as my DD is so similar to yours, hope everything is going ok for you.

Hi sorry its taken me so long to reply to your post I don\'t get on here as much anymore. I\'ve daydreamed myself as a guy too. Sometimes I feel trapped as myself in my daydream and if I\'m a guy it opens a whole new world of possibilities.

I have never been formally diagnosed, but found this out via another thread on "when I'm alone I pretend to be someone else" and the alike. It's me to a T, I'm balling my eyes out. It really IS something! <br />
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I always did this since childhood, but it hit hard when I started HS. I still do it. I'm 25. TWENTY FIVE. This is hitting 15+ years of never having MY OWN LIFE. Just the one in my head. I've had no real social life, I can't drive, I don't have a job, I've never had a relationship, etc. I have no idea where to begin in trying to stop it. I read of triggers, so that's where I'm going to begin and remember it is a disorder I'm not just 'effed up.' <br />
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I wish the medical community knew more. I've seen doctors for ages, most of which never took this seriously because I know the difference between reality and fantasy. This has consumed so much of my life. The memories, when I've tried (years ago) to look in the mirror and say "they don't exist, you aren't who you think you are" I cried hysterically. You become so attached and in love with these amazing creations. It's like, stopping makes me think how nuts I am and how much heartbreak I'll suffer over created-memories and characters. <br />
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All seriousness aside, we should all just be writers or actors, lol. <br />
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Off the jokes, everyone just take some deep breaths. Someday we'll figure this out. I do enjoy it, but it greatly has limited my life and led me to getting drunk to relive it very manically. I drink way too much and I have no life. I have found cooking and exercising are two things that are easiest to 'avoid it' as I'm very busy mentally and physically. However, listening to music is the absolute worst, as is sitting alone (like I am 24-7, living in a rural area with elderly family).

I remember the first time I found a post online about it. It felt amazing. Id felt so alone for so long and then...I just wasnt! Im really happy that you found my post and others like it. Talking to people with this same issue has definately helped me. There are alot of websites that talk about it as well if you want to learn more. Just go to google and type in Maladaptive Daydreaming. If you ever want to talk just send me a message.

Rbj3911 - THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL! I cannot describe how... glad I am to find somebody else with these exact \'feelings/dreams\' if you like. I\'ve been doing this for at least 8 years, and music is such a big trigger for me, it\'s as if a particular song triggers a whole new world or rather a new side to me. I really wish the medical community knew more about this too, I mean they don\'t class it as a mental disease do they? The worst thing is, is that I\'m probably at my happiest when I\'m dreaming! :(

I often have other day dreams tht are not assosciated with my main daydream relm. Honestly I\'m not sure about the medical community and what they consider it. If you go online there are a few different websites you can go to to read up more about it. Go to google and type in maladaptive daydreaming. One of the links say daydreaming your life away? Its a good one and there are many others.

i have md it makes me feel in control and independent i may daydream at wrong times but my daydreams help me write better nd realize things many people dnt see but i say use it as a gift because theirs so many dreams you can create

I have read this story and so many others over the past few weeks and they are all inspiring. I discovered my problem was MD on 8/15 and have been working so hard to get rid of it. I noticed that in moments of idle time such as walking, driving, and yes listening to music, thats when I am most tempted and slip up. I just keep telling myself no no no, you will not daydream. It isnt a fullproof system, but I am sure it will get easier. I guess I cant quit something I've done for 20 years in just a few weeks. I've also noticed on here mixed reviews how some people want to keep their MD and some hate it. I can see both sides, I am glad it was there in those tough times, but now all the pain and anxietg MD helped me avoid is resurfacing, so no matter what I have to deal with the problems, maybe it is Gods wau of allowing me to wait until I was older to handle them. Whatever the rhyme or reasons, I am so glad I can read up on these stories for motivation and inspiration in my journey!

One thing that's worth investigating is if your MDD is a part of a greater disorder, like ADHD that's me!) or OCD. Mine is much more under control when I'm on meds. Behavioral therapy has made a HUGE dent, helping me control when I'm off them. As a fellow music obssessed person, I hear ya! Getting the right treatment has helped me let this creativity break through rather than thwarted it. Good luck!!<br />
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yes daydreaming is stoppable. i could control it for three months or so . once you get rid of it you are less suspectable to get into again. but when i become alone during holidays back into monotony,i started with it again

its my get away too, it started when i was much younger when i had no siblings, i had a bit of an imagination- maybe like you said its to do with being creative, i think it was a way to make lonely days more fun and i suppose its because in your daydreams anything is possible which is what makes it enjoyable for me. i think im obsessed with getting things my own way - lol im not a brat coz i never do get things my own way but in the daydreams i do. maybe thats what md stems from: difficulty in accepting somethings about our lives that we cant change. is this true for everyone? <br />
thing is id really like away to control it, i read somewhere to eliminate your triggers but my triggers include music, movies/tv, books, bad events in my life i feel like thats to many things to eliminate, is there anyway you can simply cut down, not eliminate md just control it? my a - levels are coming up and i cant afford a fail please help!

I have had maladaptive daydreaming for 5 years as far as i remember, I first started off daydreaming about stuff that i really wanted to happen in my life and then i started daydream about me being a character in a 'film' but the film is the story in my head that i'm making up, occassionally I kill one off characters in my story some how.

thats exactly what i do, as if im a character in a film ive seen than i manipulate the character to be even better. i guess my character is everything i want to be.

Hi, Yes, I have that too - daydreaming my way through high school to escape, since I was super shy - I do that now too, even after university just for enjoyment's sake, but now, I wish that I was able to overcome it even a little bit. it's hard because you need something to replace it, but often times there's nothing as controllable as being able to stay in your own mind and contemplate, dream things whenever you want to.

wow I just read your story and I didn't know about this condition, LOL I think I have it too......along with hypochondriac and self diagnosis.

I am 31, and I have just started to read about maladaptive day-dreaming. It is overwhelming for me because I am realizing how much time I have wasted not living in reality and how much it has impacted my work, social life and self-esteem. I have wondered if I have a mental problem, if I am dyslexic, whether I am suicidal, do I have depression? But after reading about this, I relate so much to what people are saying, it i scary. <br />
My family has always laughed at coming into a room to find me staring at the wall. I have been described as being in my own world. Throughout first and secondary school I constantly found myself losing a lot of time staring out the window. I can't remember what I day dreamed about as a child, but my daydreams in my teens were actually quite violent and I relate to having fantasies about escaping from somewhere or rescuing someone. I obsessed about different scenarios and forced myself to fantasize over the same things. I found that I was dealing with my problems with people through excessive fantasizing and day dreaming. I listen to music constantly and have just realised that this is a common trigger for me. I would often lay awake for hours, and find myself just staring. I have let this overtake my life in a way, and I am just realizing how much time I have lost. The last job that I had was quite stressful, I day dreamed a lot and people really noticed but I couldn't stop. I would be caught almost responding to someone or making faces or laughing or crying. I constantly rocked or tapped my foot, touched my hair and my face. I have always done similar things but it was very apparent when I was in this stressful job, more so beacuse other people noticed. I researched diassociating and then came across this. <br />
I can relate these things back to repeated abuse and neglect from my parents when I was young. I remember disconnecting. That was my comfort zone. I know that when I day dream it is excessive and not healthy and not always about good things. I find it hard because, even acknowledging that this isn't good for me nd relating it back to traumatic experiences, I feel it is addictive and almost my normal state of mind. Because my traumatic experiences were when I was three, I feel like I don't know any other way to cope. But I really have to change this as I feel it is having a very negative effect on me and I am wasting my life away living in a fantasy land. <br />
I definitly feel that medication would not help me. I just don't feel like I have a mental disorder, more a behavior problem. It is a learnt coping strategy that is hard to acknowledge. Because it has obviously worked at some stage. And it is a nice place to be in fantasy land where you are in control and can resolve things your way. But the reality can be very different. <br />
I am going to try things like meditation, try to learn to control my thoughts. And concentrate on reality. I am going to keep reading about this because this has really helped me just reading about other peoples stories. Music is a big thing for me, so I am going to try to stop myself from doing things that trigger me to fantasize. Or, when I catch myself deep in a fantasy, try to think about the feelings I am looking for when I create certain scenarios. There are things that I have to let go or deal with somehow. And I have to learn to say what I think at the time. I have to stop doing this because it's not my reality and I feel like day dreaming is taking over my life. And when I snap out of it, things aren't going that great for me. Reading and relting to your stories has really overwhelmed but made me realize that this is something I want to be in control of or channel in a more healthy direction. I hope that if, like me, people think it is having a negative impact on them, they try to do something about it. It is comforting to know that I am not going crazy and that this is something that I can try to help or get help for.

Hi - great to read your post, and I can really relate. I like what you mentioned here about how to overcome it - I also agree with what you've mentioned, but I wonder what are some other ways to help with it, since it's so convenient. Once you relax or want to reward yourself from controlling your daydreams, then it will come back again, or with some triggers. Unless perhaps some strong level of self-control is developed? If that's the case, the daydreaming won't happen in the first place, though :P. Any thoughts?

I've been thinking maybe the best cure would be to find some kind of meditation retreat which lasts 6 months to a year. During that time you will be socially force into mindfullnes meditation as opposed to day dreaming whatever you want. A year of mindfullness meditation might condition a mind to control its thoughts better.

I am 16 almost 17 years old and this started as a young child. I am the only girl and middle child so im pretty much alone alot. Always had my own room ive just been indepentent all my life. I dont think its a big issue for me because i try to make time for this like before bed ,showering, vacuming and any other time im alone. The only time it really becomes a problem is in class testing, and taking notes. I make up characters but they are always adults and in the dream i am an adult too . I guess im just daydreaming of how i would want my life to be in the future. Sometimes it gets out of hand and ill smile or cry or laugh. But i dont beleive this is that much of an issue. :) <br />
If anyone thinks otherwise please comment.

i have maladaptive daydream since i was little girl. still do have MD since then, i found myself daydreaming when i'm stress, sad, depressed, or when i want to sleep. daydream is a beautiful thing. i can't help it when theres a man, with children, in a rural, or tropical where i like to be. i don't have those in real life.

That's just fascinating!

I am 12 and I have MD and I've had it for 4 years and no one knows about <br />
It and I don't want to go to a doctor. I have found my triggers I just feel so close <br />
To it . What can I do?

I had joined this web site only to post this comment.(excuse my poor english -i am from Russia)<br />
My problem is the same , i cant stop daydreaming.<br />
But i think there is a way through wich you can take ..control,, over this mind process.<br />
The key word is ,,control,, .This hapens becouse we are not aware of what actually is hapening inside our minds. In Budhist meditations terminology exists a word wich determines our awareness level , its called ,,mindfulness,, .This is the main idea of all meditations, being aware of your thoughts and being able to concentrate on a certain ,,thing,, as (breathing). Through this meditation practices you get the ability to control your thoughts and many other benefits.<br />
I am absolutely against any medicamentation healing becouse i am sure i does not help actually is makes things even worse (been there , done that)!<br />
I am practicing meditation almost one year and i can say that it realy works. here are some recommended books if you are tired of complaining and have the motivation to start living.<br />
,,Wherever you go there you are,,-Jon Kabat Zinn ,,Mindfulness in plain english,,-Bhante Henepola Gunaratana.

I had joined this web site only to post this comment.(excuse my poor english -i am from Russia)<br />
My problem is the same , i cant stop daydreaming.<br />
But i think there is a way through wich you can take ..control,, over this mind process.<br />
The key word is ,,control,, .This hapens becouse we are not aware of what actually is hapening inside our minds. In Budhist meditations terminology exists a word wich determines our awareness level , its called ,,mindfulness,, .This is the main idea of all meditations, being aware of your thoughts and being able to concentrate on a certain ,,thing,, as (breathing). Through this meditation practices you get the ability to control your thoughts and many other benefits.<br />
I am absolutely against any medicamentation healing becouse i am sure i does not help actually is makes things even worse (been there , done that)!<br />
I am practicing meditation almost one year and i can say that it realy works. here are some recommended books if you are tired of complaining and have the motivation to start living.<br />
,,Wherever you go there you are,,-Jon Kabat Zinn ,,Mindfulness in plain english,,-Bhante Henepola Gunaratana.

i might be suffering from MD. Does it needs medical attention? or am I suffering from AvPD ? My case is pretty much like yours. Just that , mine ain't coz of abuse etc.. i started when it was 6.

Im not exactly sure. Are you just her in your daydreams or do you pretend to be her in real life?

well, maybe i just haven't met her yet, i think about getting a counselor, but that probably won't even work. but sometimes i pretend i'm her is that a split personaltity or is it still daydreaming.

This 8 year old may just be a character that you've created in your mind. Ive done this many times. There is one character that is every single daydream I have. I didnt make her up tho. Shes someone that really exsists. Ive never met her but when I saw her she just seemed like the perfect person for my stories I guess.

I thik i may have excessive daydreaming, when i go to sleep i just daydream with my eyes open and when i'm alone i'm always daydreaming i can't really control it. When i was little i had a ruff life i was wondering if that is why i daydream constantly, i daydream of an 8 yr old who i don't even know, but she's in every daydream of mine. i'v been doing this for 7yrs, i don't know if it could be daydreaming or a split personality.

MD is a very hard thing to over come. Unfortunately its still pretty new and most of the stuff that we know about it are from personal accounts from people who suffer from it. In fact most doctors have never even heard of MD.The good thing is that there are a lot more people coming out with there condition and talking about it. One of the best things right now is to know that you are not alone. There are so many people out there who suffer from this and there are a lot of websites to read up about it that I will send you the links for. One of the first things to do is to completely make sure that it is MD that you are dealing with and not something else like depression or anxiety. If it is in fact MD then there are somethings that you can do to try to keep yourself from daydreaming. A lot of people try to stay busy on something that they really need to put all their attention on so their mind can't wonder. Second there are things that you should try to avoid. Triggers like music, television, the computer, or video games etc... They can all send you into a daydreaming frenzy. Of course everyone has their own triggers so you need to find out what yours are and try to avoid them. You said you were having a hard time sleeping and I completely understand. You can't avoid sleeping. Ever since I was a child I haven't been able to sleep on a schedule. I lay in bed for hours and hours and daydream even when I know I have to be up at a certain time. It never seems like it to me tho. 3 hours can feel like 10 minutes. You can try to take something to make you sleep for a short period of time but there is no permanent fix. I wouldn't recommend anything long term until you talk to your doctor about not being able to sleep. The only thing that has ever worked for me to be able to fall asleep fast is exhaustion. Not just being really tired but wearing my body and mind out completely but that isn't good for your body or mind and can be very dangerous to more then your health. Physical exercise can help sometimes. The best thing I can do is to tell you to look at these other websites and talk to other people with MD and ask them what they do to control it. There are medications that arn't meant for MD but do help the with daydreaming. I have read about certain people using antidepressants to help control their MD. Of course talk to your doctor before starting any medications and see what his/her oppinion is. Since most doctors dont know much about MD then you might want to print stuff up about it and tell him why you think its MD and not depression or something else. I would read more about MD first if I were you and I am sorry that I couldn't help more but the websites I gave you I hope will help. Good luck with your MD and if you ever want to tell someone your story I would love to hear it. It helps me to learn about others and when and why they started daydreaming. What they daydream about and compare things. It is very nice to find someone that you have things in common with when it comes to this.

I did not know about MD, till I googled for ways to stop daydreaming. I think, I'm suffering from MD. Since the last 4 months, have been finding it hard to sleep. I did not link my insomnia to compulsive day dreaming. Is there anything that I can do to get over this. I'm sleep walking through my life right now. Please help.