Life Inside My Head!I have been daydreaming from before I can remember, I mean probably when I first started school at 4/5 if not before that. I am now 20 years old and in university. Its like a entire movie/novel and it has been the same story on going from ever since. As I get older and understand life more, fall in love and travel this main character does all those things with me, but everything in her world is perfect and more elaborate. I know what her face looks like, I have created an entire world around her, she has a single mom, her dad abandened her, she has one sister. I have an exact name for her, her birthday.. I mean its to the point where when its her birthday in real life she celebrates it inside my head, the plot gets very detailed. She has been through different relationships, at the moment she is with my dream boyfriend.She basically went from rags to riches and now she is the big superstar. She basically done all the things I would like to do, and she's very beautiful, filthy rich and wild. I myself is only inside this world when she meets me and treats me somewhat of a charity case lol.
I try to figure out the link between myself and this girl and its I find it maybe because I try to be the too perfect, I am a perfectionist and this is impossible to acheive in reality so I live it inside my mind. I feel like i cant really control how things happen in reality but i have full control over what happens in my head. I think it might also be the media's idea of perfect as my daydreaming is triggered by movies, some reality tv shows, music..there are guest appearances from celebs in my plot.. Also by things that happen in my life and the people around me. I will sit around and create this story for hours a day. I will finish a task just to get back to daydreaming. I can clearly differenciate between reality and my dream world but sometimes when the characters cry I cry or get really depressed.. Sometime when I am depressed i express this in the plot and kind of let out my feelings in the characters. As I am writing this I realise how weird this sounds.
I dont think I am crazy, I get very good grades in school, but now especially at university I drift off into this dream world because lectures are not interactive and I am just sitting there for an hour, I haveto try really hard to focus, and sometimes I just give in. this happens in church also, or whenever I am doing nothing for a while. I haveto make up for this by alot of self study, which takes alot of focus. I do good but I think I can be greater if i can control my daydreaming more. Sometimes i dont even want to go out because i rather daydream, and I have friends but i am not the most sociable. Otherwise this doesnt really affect me. Its glad to know that there are others like me. I will stop here because this is getting too much to read, but I just wanted to share my story.
Thanks for reading x
and please respond if you can relate, I would like to get to know other daydreamers like myself.. :D
imaddicted 18-21, F 21 Responses 4 Aug 26, 2012