My Life Is Hell

Some people think I have a good life because I seem to get everything I want, which is not true. Ever since my step dad moved in I've gotten more and more depressed because of the emotional abuse. He has never physically abused me, but he always does emotionally. I have even gotten suicidal at times. And when I told him, he said "Go ahead then." I felt so hated. And my mom is always on his side. Instead of helping me, she just makes me feel worse. And I also get bullied at school which doesn't help at all. I sleep a lot because when I'm sleeping I don't have to deal with everything. I really wish everything was back the way it was 5 years ago, before my parents got divorced and my step dad moved in. :(
MyArmHurts MyArmHurts
18-21, F
4 Responses May 21, 2012

Story of my life. Thanks for sharing this.

Try to have something to look forward to (like the day you can stand on your own feet and move out..) Take strength in finding and using your individuality and not listening to negative people. Make plans!! I too have used sleeping to deal with depression but if you do that too much you may risk your chances of becoming independent and it may leave you helpless to their attempts to thwart your own personal growth

i know things may seem really unhappy, maybe even sometimes unbearable...but one thing
for sure...the way some people try to make you feel can either be very temporary or you
can choose to let what 1 person said or did to you last as long as you choose to let it..
i know that may sound so cut and dry,but there are some people that are just too stupid
or too uncaring to watch what they say and do...as far as school goes,i once parked my butt
right in the principles' office every morning for 3 days cause all the talking and telling
wasnt working....so i just went right in and said its your job to see that i am educated and
safe...it only took them 3 days to find me my own little room...i was embarressed and
ashamed at first,but then i thought,"what the heck,this is my life,i could not,and would
not give anyone else that kind of power to abuse me" cause at the end of the day i
was going home an emotional mess....spending more time alone was a little hard
at first,but i became stronger and more outspoken for the right reasons...i graduated,went
on to college away from hometown....And i can honestly say that first day in highschool
i chose to be alone, was the day i decided how to live!!!
GodSpeed,to ya

PS.I got a few tricks of the trade for step-parents,if your interested..haha

Im sorry, I really know how you feel :/ I know that being depressed could make everything confusing, especially if your own mom is like that and how people bully you at school and they dont even know whats goin on, or who you really are. I think thats ****** up