Its Been A Year!!!!!

well im am 20 years old when i was 15 i fall head over hills for my first love i was with him for 4 years we were both each others first, i moved in with him and things started going down hill it was about the last month we were together i first heard he was talking and hangout with another girl when he got off work, before he came home to me, he lied when i asked him about it. But i believed him anyway because i trusted him. well a month later one night he didnt come home until about 1:00 am and  he layed beside me in bed and wake me up and told me that he wanted to break up, so within an hour i packed all my things and moved in with my mom. and sure enough my younger brother told me that my ex was messing around with that girl for about amonth. My heart hurt so bad i couldnt take it any more so the next day my mom went to the store and left me at the house i got in my moms med. box and took a bounch of pills my whole body went numb and i started to get scared i remember picking up the phone and calling my sister it took my about 5 mins. to dial her number..she hung up and called 911 thats all i remember from that day...But about a month after that i started dating my boyfriend we've been together ever since and i love him dont get me wrong, But everyday at some point i start to think about my ex. and i miss him so bad and i start to cry. I know i should be happy, and as much as i want to not think of him, and as much as i hate what he did to me, i cant get him off my mind...Its been a year....and i still think of him every single day..and i fell bad bc my boyfriend loves me and i just feel like im not giving him all of me..My ex is engaged with the girl he cheated on me with...and he seems happy, so y cant I?????jess 
jess1992tate jess1992tate
18-21
May 9, 2012