Welcome! You Are Amongst Friends Here.

I invite all who have endured the life lessons of hardship and sacrifice that come along with surviving rape and in-cest to sit here and rest a while.  I have a tale, as do all of you who come here, but I will get to that later.

This is not a place to be judged or figure out who has had the worst experience. This is a place to share your experiences and how you work to overcome them in an effort to help ourselves and other survivors. You are amongst friends here and you are welcomed with open arms and opened hearts.
Arcanum Arcanum
41-45, F
4 Responses Jan 15, 2008

Umm hello. Younger in my life my brother who was like fifteen played with me and I didnt know the difference, until i got to be like 8 or 9 so for 3 years ive been having flashbacks of that day and each time i get depressed and everyone is all in my face about it and if i tell someone eventually itll get back to my family and then well break apart and ill b livin on the streeets,and i just have been having this on my mind for a long time and it freaks me out. I just dont know how much longer I can hold out the only way i know to deal with this is cutting my wrists but last time i got caught and there was this whole ordeal about my skool that I had been cuttin myself. Ive had depression every year since the incident. A week after that happened I wet the bed every night for a week. I just dont know what to do because every year like 4 times a year i get depression and almost kill myself every time. AND IM GOING FREAKIN' INSANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Very nice message.

I survived an entire child hood of ******. As a small child, you are not aware what it is or that it isn't something that happens to all children. Kinda like spanking. You don't like it, but that doesn't stop parents from doing it. It wasn't til I was much older, say 11 or so, that I realized that it wasn't normal. I still didn't tell anyone. Everyone handles lifes obstacles in different ways. Me, I turned inward. I threw myself into my school work and, became an all A student. I then turned wild at 16. Became a teenage mother. Experimented with drugs. Dropped out of school. I was quite the rebel. I could have easily blamed my life choices on what happened to me my entire childhood. But, deep down, I knew that wasn't the reason. I could have fooled a lot of people into believing it was. I wanted to hurt my parents. Make them feel a little bit of what I felt. However, hurting them hurt me. Talking did not make me feel better. Writing did not make me feel better. LIFE made me feel better! What happened to me was wrong and something I could never have changed or controlled. But, what happened to me is what set me forth on my lifes journey. I am not who I am because of my past. I am who I am because of the choices I make.

wow, nice idea!