This Is How I Feel.

I feel like my life is slowly coming to an end.
I feel as if there is no way out of this hell.
I always feel like i am such a horrible person, like there is no reason why i should even be here on earth.
People always call me a "fatass" or "fat" or a "*****".

I have been anorexic once-i got a concussion two years ago and it made me even more depressed, so i stopped eating.
I lost 10 pounds within one month, and then instead of people calling me a "fatass" i was called the anorexic girl.
I weighed 110 pounds, and i am 5'10". I felt so beautiful and skinny in that body, but i felt like i could do so much better.
So i stopped eating even more.
The most i would eat was an apple a day. Not even a full apple, like a half of a apple.
When i didn't loose more weight i became very upset and started to cut myself.

Cutting myself helps me get away from everything... Instead of having the pain in my head and chest, i draw it down to having it all on my wrist.
I don't like how i cut myself, but it makes me feel so much better.

Also i am suicidal.
I want to kill myself so bad, i have tried overdosing so many times and it never works.
I just want to be in peace, not having to worry about anything anymore.
Everything just seems so simple when your dead.
And thats what i want, to be dead.
miamiheatforevrx miamiheatforevrx
18-21, F
Sep 23, 2012