I Am What I Am, Nothing More, Nothing Less...

I have always been this way.  It's just my nature.  I am an oldest child.  I also am the oldest child to two alcoholic parents.  So not only did I raise my sister, but my parents as well.  Now that we are all adults, I'm resented by both of them.  I don't ask anything from them, yet when they are in trouble, I am the first person they run to.  I don't mean finacial rescueing, as they are both doing better than I am.  But when they need emotional rescueing, or something is going on in thier life, and they need someone on their side, they always come to me.  I don't mind being there for them, as they are my mom, and my sister.  I have always been that way to my friends too.  I'm the one who thinks of others, plans the baby showers, bridal showers, does this for this one, does that for someone else.  I plan the surprises in life.  Reaches out to someone who seems to have lost their way.  I am the person people tell thier secrets to, and sometimes I am able to help them thru, even if just to cry with them, so they don't have to cry alone. 

But sometimes, maybe just once, I would like someone to think that highly of me, and do something like that for me.  I would like to know what it's like to be that special in someone else life.   Perhaps someday....  but for now, I like being the way I am, and I love making others in my life feel like they are something speical to me. 

iwantlove iwantlove
46-50, F
3 Responses Jan 28, 2009

"Rescuing" you mean. Poor Shakespeare!

Oh my we are so alike in this. It is almost as if I wrote this story. I can't count the times I have said, " why does everyone think I never need a shoulder?" Then one day it hit me....and I am so glad to be on the end of the stick in which I have alway resided. <br />
I am not saying I have never needed that shoulder to cry on...but when I do...I cry on Jesus' shoulder. He is enough for me. I am very glad that I can share my strength, and wisdom with those who are not as strong. I am glad that I go straight to the teacher and "chew my own food"( rather than need pre-chewed). In other words I get my help from the Prince Himself where as some go to those whom He has helped.

That shows a caring heart. And caring hearts can't stay alone for long. they are too valuable. Someone will certainly grab you.