The Hot Skillet Hit the Pavement

While living aboard a ship is adventurous, one yearns to be in an actual "normal" home. And when the opportunity presents itself, I was one who would take advantage. A shipmate of mine was going to see his folks, & invited me along. We got to his parent's home alright, & went in made our introductions & small talk & his mom invited me to dinner. She was cooking something in a huge electric skillet that smelled heavenly to me, & so I was looking forward to a home cooked meal, naturally. So, my shipmate & I are sitting at the kitchen table w/ a couple of cans of "pop". (Pop!? What the hell kind of word is that for soda?)

Her husband walks in the back door from work, & looks all kinds of ticked off. My shipmate & I look at each other & I'm ready to split the scene because I thought it might be my presence there. (As it turned out it wasn't.) He strolls over to where his wife was cooking & says something so stupid I could not believe my ears! "W..T..F IS THIS GARBAGE!?"

Added note: First off, someone is cooking dinner for you, you do not insult the food. Even if later it tastes like singed shoe sole & asphalt, you keep your opinion to yourself. At least that was how I was taught. Second, never  insult a woman's cooking while she's cooking it. Hot stuff + Spoken insults about the food = Someone's wearing hot stuff. 

The next thing I know my shipmate's mom neatly reaches over to the nearby screened window across from where she's cooking, pulls the two release thingy's inward on the bottom sides of the screen, & throws the screen upward violently. The screen & it's frame fall out of the window, crash onto the counter & before it could rest, she deftly backhands it into the side of the refrigerator.

"Oh sh*t"! I'm thinking.

Then while the skillett is still cooking & plugged in, she picks it up & out the window it goes! The electrical cord pulls out of the skillett's connector & lays there on the counter like an electrified sad & dejected black snake. My shipmate & I exchange glances & I'm feeling really uncomfortable. I get up & head for the front door, but I stop. My shipmate is all in his stepdad's face & should it come to fisticuffs I would need to be there to back my shipmate. But, thank God he then apologized, explaining something about his job & everything was cool after that.

That was a very strange experience. The oddest part in my mind was that I would have had to, in respect to my shipmate & my own honor; "sneak" his step dad from behind to help take him out. I would have done it too which is even stranger still.

navyvet navyvet
56-60, M
Feb 23, 2009