What Am I Doing?

I have been married for a year. I love my husband with all my heart. We have a two year old daughter whom I adore. I dont really know what the problem is. I feel so ****** up inside, like I can't possibly care deeply about anything. I have flirting with a friend of mine lately. I don't intend on cheating on my husband and I've made that clear to my friend but I like the way it feels to have his attention. I feel bad. I'm so broken. I feel like i'm going to cheat even though I dont want to. My husband deserves so much more. I don't know whats wrong with me. I feel like I gave up on him and everything I expected from my marriage.
cobweb10 cobweb10
22-25, F
6 Responses Jan 13, 2013

I'm the husband in a situation like yours. My wife says things like fighting and stuff made her cheat on me. BS! Just because things are not going right in your marriage does not give you the right to go out and let some other guy F you.. You talk it over with you husband or you get a divorse. I wish she had done this with me. No she did not. I got to see her on her knees with that guy f ing the s out of her and that was some thing i did not deserve. She did not care about her self, me or are 5 year old daughter when she degrated her self that way. I was inside the house where it happened and she did not care that i could and did catch them. To me she is worthless. I did not know i was not meeting her needs, how could i she never told me. I did nothing wrong. She crossed that line when she cheated. Yea we did fight over stupid stuff, but that does not give anybody the right to distroy a commeted marriage. You need to stop right now or leave your husband and only after you leave then go be a stupid *****.

Hi Cob Web 10- I would take it in a different direction: It is natural for us to feel attracted to more than one person. It does not mean in the slightest that you do not love your husband. Of course you do. Throughout history, it has been normal to have multiple sexual partners. I know you feel guilty, but you shouldn't. It's not about giving up on him, or about him at all, and nothing is wrong with you! If you enjoy the attention from this other man, then enjoy it to its fullest, be completely happy, and then return to your husband a vibrantly happy woman, and let it overflow to him.

add me please

I would just go for the Other Guy a little maybe Test the waters

My husband and I have trouble connecting on an emotional level. We have a good sex life. I dont know why but I just feel like I need the other guy to not focus on the issues with my husband.

It's normal to feel that way... Is there any reason why you would pursue this? If everything is going great, then why risk it? I have a lover, but, it is with my husband's permission and it is because my husband will not have sex with me.

If had sex from my husband I wouldn't need my lover at all...

So all I am saying is I envy the people that have it all, and they should think things through before they do anything.