I Dont Feel Bad About Wanting To Cheat On My Wife

I think about this alot lately. My wife isnt unattractive, or overweight, shes a fox, sex fantastic, unhuman, her personality has changed though,in the nine years we have been together. She used to be a free spirit no fear. Now she just worries and questions. I used o feel like a man with her, warrior, beast, now im just a shadow of that person, i used to defend her honor at every turn. Now im defending myself.
caveman776 caveman776
46-50, M
5 Responses Jan 16, 2013

When you Find your spouse having done something wrong and you want to correct them then humble yourself first and advice with the best possible manners in privacy, not in public . Make very sure you don't hurt their feelings .
"Whoever protects the honour of his brother, will have Allah protect his countenance from the fire on the Day of Judgement" [Al Nawawi, Riyad al Salihin p 488, Hadith no 1530]

Well as a cheating wife, I do not see any harm in a little action on the side especially if you are not appreciated at home. Every man needs to feel that he is important and needed. I think I have made some mens marriage stronger by what I have done. It has also helped me in mine.

What about trying to put her worries to rest, maybe romancing her, maybe looking for what attracted the two of you in the first place?

I am someone who worries a lot but I try to figure out what is real about it or how real a problem is...it drove my husband nuts and we are separated now.

So as a worrying person, what I would have liked is someone to ask me, what are your worries today, or how are you feeling and so on? But I think it also gets hard to be in your shoes.

It is not a personal affront to him, it is things I get in my head and he was the one here to answer them or as the bill payer, the one responsible for our household.

Maybe her worry isn't directed at you but her mentality? I am sorry for the frustration that I cause.

perhaps something to ponder on-how would you feel if in fact she were saying the same would it bother you? perhaps that could put things into perspective

Dear Caveman, this is very hard for me to read, because I have been cheated on several times by the so called partner in my life, and he says he doesn't get what he needs from me, and blames me - I too have become a worry pot-and have changed somewhat by things that have happened over the past few years-but he was not supportive emotionally at all and now i know he was messing around even when things were good. Have you guys tried counselling? If you cheat, there is no turning back, the pain and hurt it causes the other person is soul destroying, if you don't see things working out, rather set her free, because honestly it is unfair to keep her, but still look outward-I'm speaking from my own experience. For better or for worse-those are vows the two of you took-seek counselling, if you really want to try make your marriage work, there are always 2 sides to every story, perhaps she is unhappy too and not telling you about it either? BUT cheating is not the answer-because even though you say she is not ugly or unattractive-she will think she is, compare herself to other women and I don't think thats what you want, You need to feel needed, she needs to feel supported-sounds like there could be a communication gap. You sound angry-or if you just don't feel guilty-well then let her go, so she can be with someone who would not dream of cheating on her. We're all free spirits, and then we grow up, and take on this thing called life, and yes sometimes women especially-like to take everything on-esp in today's times-and this could make you feel not needed. CHEATING is selfish, unfair on the other person and wrong