Trying to Resist Temptation!

My husband of 11 years cheated on me with someone he "worked" with, and I have never really been able to heal from the hurt and let it go.  I tried and am still trying to do the right thing and work on forgiving him, but I can't help fantasizing about someone coming into my life to take me away from all of this.  I don't actually have someone in particular in mind, and God knows I think cheating is So wrong, but I've been hurt so many times and I wish that he (my husband) knew, just once, how it feels to have your heart broken.  Revenge really isn't the way to go, but, what else can I do?  I mean, it's not even like he's learned the error of his ways and is trying to clean up his act.  He still continues to contact "the other woman", and he thinks that I don't know about it.  He "locks" his cell phone and texts like mad, stopping only when I enter the room.  He practically lives on MySpace--and his "friends" (mostly women, by the way) all have their half-naked pictures posted up for him to drool over.  Sure, he TELLS me that he loves me and that I'm the only woman for him, but it's all lies.  He doesn't care about me or how I feel, so why should I care about how he feels?  Because I'm not too bright, that's why.  I don't really know how I'll wind up handling this situation, I just don't want to do the wrong thing.  Every time I think he's up to no good, it gets harder and harder to play by the rules.  Again, I'm NOT an advocate for adultery, but does anyone else know how to get over being cheated on?  This really stinks....

TiredinTampa TiredinTampa
1 Response Mar 14, 2009

Well talking about things is always a good first step to take. <br />
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I think its hard to say exactly what you should do not knowing all the facts... like what went on that led to his affair, or why he is more interested in others than he is in you? <br />
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But really it seems like you want to leave your husband and get out of the marriage, as you say you're fantasy is "fantasizing about someone coming into my life to take me away from all of this." I am guessing that there is more wrong with this relationship than just the sex with another woman issue.