...im Nothing If Not His

many nights ive fallen asleep crying thinking about the day i die and how terrified iam of dying... my mother in law is a jehova's witness, she claims there is absolutely nothing after death, that we just simply disappear... it hurts me to think that... i love my husband like i never thought i could love anyone in this world, besides my son and even though i am 19 years old... i know what love is... and im afraid to lose that, im afraid to die for the fact that im afraid to be without my husband and children... im afraid that when i die, i wont remember them, or see them... im afraid that i wont ever get to be with them, i even wish to be immortal no matter the consequences just to be with them... our love is not til death to us part... its further than that... i told him to swear that if he died first, that he would wait for me or if he couldnt wait long for him to come for me... i told him that i wanted to be burried in the same coffin as him, our bodies hugging each other... when i was 16, i was so desperate to commit suicide, and i was so close to doing so and now that i have him... im terrified of dying... why is there death? why did adam and eve have to do what they did? i wouldnt have to worry about this at such a young age... but death lurks behind people until its time... i hate death...
JuicyJuice0303 JuicyJuice0303
18-21, F
Jul 15, 2010