Can't Handle The Pain

I don't know how to start! Too many painfull memories and too many detials, but i will try to keep it short. I'm from an arabic country and i have a family of ten, my parents never gave me much attention and i felt invisble and sad. I was always screamed at and punished, but my parents never hit me. When i grew up my dad got really sick so my brothers took control of the house and made themselves responisble, and my mom couldn't do anything about it. When they became resposible as they claimed hell and torture began! I never had a choice of my own, i was forced to wear a vail and cover my face, and i barely had a choice of which college to choose. My two eldest brothers who like to control my life and my sisters were monsters, and they always verbly and phiscally abuse us. They also don't let us go out of the house sometimes. Too many bad memories i just cant lay them out in order. When things go worse they forced me to get married and i new if i didnt my life would get much worse then the hell i am living in. A flash of memory came to my mind of the beatings i get when i dont do as they say made me say yes. I want to die!!! I think of running or killing myself all the time. I'm scared and i don't know what to do.
cheesecake16 cheesecake16
26-30, F
2 Responses Jan 14, 2013

Your story really touched me, I'm so sorry that you've been treated like this.No woman deserves this. You are really brave.
It's probably a dumb question but does your country have organizations that help women?
Maybe you should try to contact foreign embassies or consulates. They maybe have programs to help women like you.
If you tell me your country's name, I will do some researches.
Please, hold on!

Sorry i took so long to reply!
I'm from saudi arabia, riyadh
I wish there would be a way to get away from this hell!

I got in touch with some organizations yesterday to see if they could help you.
I can't promise anything to you but I'll contact you as soon as they reply to me .
Stay strong!

Find someone to run away with? Maybe out of country. But make sure he/she's not a sex slaver... LOL... Sorry not funny, it's shocking ><. Thinking that there are worse things that could happen might not be very comforting.

Suffering can bring strength and understanding to those who withstand it. Or recover from it..

If you were Christian I would say that doing your best to keep your faith regardless during this hell, would bring you much closer to heaven. Don't think you are though..


What do you want to do? Other than run away, or end your current existence. (the latter doesn't have to entail dieing btw)

I don't want to end die, we are like christians we should have faith, and yes suffering makes us stronger but what if the fuffering never ends! I do want to run away but here a women can't go out of the country wirh her legal guardian permision. I found someone to run away with but how and where should we go?

I'm sorry for my grammar and spelling mistakes, i just can't seem to focus these days.

As long as the message is understood, grammar isn't so important.. It's always good to practice getting it right though.

Is there some authority you can go to report such abuse, that would help you?

Otherwise I have no way of knowing where you should go. I could only make suggestions. Is it possible for you to get a legitimate job out of country, or in a different city that would take you away?

It seems like you really need a way to tell people how you feel.

Tell the people you know how you feel, without them judging and ordering you about.

^ that is what I meant by "It seems like you really need a way to tell people how you feel"

Sorry for triple post, I like to reword my posts but can't without edit &gt;&gt;'

Well I suppose you could just go to another city and get a job and live there. If it's not illegal.

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