I think of this more often than I wish to. If I could just release the past and keep moving on, which I know is possible if I convince myself to do so, everything would be much better. The intrusive thought; "What if?" often keeps me awake at night. It also has the power to make me feel pretty bad when I am happy. I should not let it make me feel that way. I believe everything happens for a reason, and if it did not happen, it was not meant to be.