Thinking Like This Is Driving Me Crazy, I Need Some Help/advice

I literally can't stop thinking in what ifs.  I don't remember exactly when I started thinking this way, but its an uncontrollable habit now.  Sometimes I have trouble falling asleep at night because I go over my actions of the day and think of what I should have or could have done.  Even during the day, I'll sometimes find myself zoning and day dreaming, thinking up some crazy 'what if' scenario.  What if I say this, to this person, about this, what will they say, what will they think?  Thats the sort of thought pattern I find myself getting caught into multiple times a day.  It's caused me to be a very indecisive person.  I can't make decisions a lot of the time because I think of too many what ifs, and I can't decide what the best choice for me is.  It completely traps me sometimes.  For a while, I tried not caring about anything in my life so I wouldn't have anything to worry about.  But that didn't really work.  There was less what ifs, but still some.  My social anxiety was once thing that still caused a lot of what ifs.  The main reason it didn't work though is because it felt like I wasn't living for anything.  Once I started caring about things and people that were important to me, I realized how much I had been letting life pass me by before.  But once I start caring about things I get more anxious about them, and then I start thinking of more what ifs.  I can't live my life like this anymore.  If anyone who has experienced this can give me some advice, that would be much appreciated.

dm1290 dm1290
18-21, M
2 Responses Feb 26, 2010

Thanks for the comments, its hard to believe its been 2 years since I wrote this. While I do feel that I still have some social anxiety, my overall "what if" thinking has definitely gone down. I think the out of control what if thinking was mostly a result of the severe depression I was experiencing at the time; I did not have much control over my mind. I can't say I had a specific strategy to get over what if thinking, but I think that working on confidence helps.

What if's are fine when you are trying to plan, but somewhere down the line you've got to have a little faith. Maybe the what ifs are something from your childhood, afraid of getting into trouble. Everybody makes mistakes. When this happens try to refocus your mind on something else.