I Was A Mom....

I was a mom... Oh I'm still a mom but my kids are 28 & 35. My 35 has 2 sons... And is so distant from me & I dont get the grandsons EVER. Its sad, yes, but its cause she married a controlling guy who's own mother controlled his life. Watching him (mis)treat his son in front of my eyes makes me so sad in my heart.. but I cant do a thing about it. My daughter's last words: "You're just jealous I have a great husband & 2 kids and a great life, that you didnt." (I'm very happy if thats the case, but I think she is hiding behind that statement). Her classmates have said the same thing, that she has to ask (ASK?) her husband if she can go shopping, or go see her mom ( she no longer comes to see me)..
My son is 28, very helpful, very loving.. he doesnt understand his sister ( he doesnt understand his mother either)..he doesnt want to be in-between either of us.. great guy.. I just wished he'd find a girlfriend, make some grandkids & let me spoil his kids of the future.. he said I WILL get that chance.. He said " they can stay with you mom all summer long".. ..
I'm embarrassed that my friends' all know their grandkids AND are close to them too.
I'd like to understand what I did wrong in my daughters life to lose her..
I blame my mother because she used to tell people in her life that my daughter deserved a much better life and she would treat her ( my daughter) with luxuries and a lavish wedding.. and all things I couldnt do as a single low paid mom.

My mother hated my existence on earth. I was slapped across my face, sent to a psychologist at age 7, told I was crazy lazy & dumb. I was screamed at... yes I screamed at mine too..but mine got hugs & told they were loved..

I dont hate my mom, but I dont love her either.

Dysfunctional emotional verbal family settings.
LostOutLoud LostOutLoud
51-55, F
Dec 7, 2012