Another Entry In The Book Of Stupid Things Clay Has Done

Well I need to get caught up on a lot of stories but this was a particularliry funny episode that happened today so I thought I would share it.
I have found that most of my readers like hearing about the idiotic mishaps of my older brother Clay, lets face it he always seems to be getting himself into ridiculous perdicaments but life would be boring without him.

Our story begins yesterday morning when Clay was sent to my Uncles ranch to pick up a breeding bull and bring it back.
Clay managed to get it loaded and thought he had been successful in transporting it home.
Much to all our suprise the trailer was empty when he returned.
My dad was furious and demanded to know where his bull was?
Clay just shrugged his shoulders and scratched his head and said "I dunno I guess he must have jumped out somewhere along the way."
We found this to be true when we noticed the side gate on the trailer wasnt latched properly, the bull had escaped and was wandering along the highway somewhere between here and my Aunt and Uncles ranch.
My dad was boiling mad and sent Clay out to go and find the bull and bring it home, he didnt want to send out any of the real "working men" to fix his mess and my dad volunteered to go with if he needed assistance.
Clay tried to argue his case by saying that my dad is the one who owns both the trailer and the bull and so he is the one who should have sent someone else more responsible. Most fathers would have not have not been pleased to hear thier son talking like that to them, but my dad just said "Clayton please hush so I can think in silence for a moment about how much to dock off your pay check for this little incident........if that bull is hurt or dead YOU will be paying for him...........the next time I need a bull picked up i'll send Erica to do it."
Clay has a past history of lots of stupid stunts, but my dad said he can't fire his own son so thats why he still works here.

They found the bull several miles away from the ranch, grazing on some weeds beside the road, he was still alive but had scrapes and cuts  on his legs.
This bull is very large he is close to 2,000 lbs, big and black with muscles all over but the advantage was that he didnt have horns.
My dad suggested that they wouldnt need horses for this job, because this bull was as gentle as a kitten and they would easily be able to load him on foot.
Unforchantly my dad did not factor how upset a 2,000 pound bull would be after accidently being unloaded in the middle of nowhere.
Within minutes Mr. Bull had chased Clay up a nearby cotton wood tree and had chased my dad into the back of the truck. He then proceeded to ram the side of Clay's truck with full force leaving a large dent in the back fender.
Against all odds my dad and Clay (after being tree'd three more times) did manage to load the bull in the trailer and deliver him home safely.

Okay so now here is where I come in
Usually every day after school I got outside and walk around and see what trouble I can cause, I notice Clay had his truck parked near the machine shop so I headed over there to pick on him.
When I arrived I saw that he had been trying to hammer the dents out of the fender, he loves that truck but since this whole bull incident was his fault he knew dad wouldn't  pay to have it fixed so he decided to see what kind of "Auto Body" job he could do to fix it himself.
I walked up to the truck and said in a sweet voice "Clay???? Where are you big brother?????"
There appeared to be no one around, but then I heard a slight snoring noise coming from under the truck.
I knelt down and sure enough there was my lazy brother taking an afternoon nap, I guess he had got tired of working but seriously??? Who sleeps under a truck..... in the dirt...... using a toolbox for a pillow???

 A perfectly awful idea popped into my head and so I slithered my way under the truck and fished his keys out of his pocket.
My plan was to start the truck and rev up the engine really loud that should wake him up hahaha HaHaHa HAHAHA.
Clay has been known to be a very very deep sleeper,  heck I bet he could sleep through a bank robbery...........nah I take that back because he would want some of the money hahaha.
Anyways I got in his truck and put the keys in the  ignition, turned it on and stomped down on the gas pedal.................VAAAAROOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
beneath me I hear "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *BANG!!!!!* OWWWWWWWW S of B!!!!!"
Hahahahah =)) Clay was very quickly awaken to the sound of being run over by a truck, he scrambled out from underneath and then proceeded to chase the fleeing prankster (at the same time rubbing his head because he had banged it on the underside of the truck). I didnt think he would be happy when he woke up so I took off running.
As I was running away I heard him behind me yelling "WHAT THE H*** IS YOUR FING PROBLEM!!!!! YOU ALMOST GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!!!!!!"
Once I was far enough away I dropped to the ground and rolled around laughing hahahahaha =)) oh that was rich, I know it was mean but technically this is ALL his own fault, if he hadn't lost the bull in the first place he wouldn't have had to fix the dents and henceforth wouldnt have fallen asleep.

Well the news went straight to my parents and we were both scolded: me for waking him up and him for swearing at me.
I know my dad doesnt like when I scare people and I admit it is not very nice, but on the other hand " Never cussing in the presents of a lady" is on the top of his "gentleman list".

Clay was not mad at me for very long, and we have since made up out brother/sister friendship. In our family Clay and me are actually the closest in age and my mom thinks it was his influence that made me into such a tomboy lol, we used to be friends but as the years have gone by our relationship has slightly faded.
Family is very important, they drive us crazy, get on our nerves, and ocassionally upset and disappoint us, but they are also the ones who are there for us at our best and at our worst. Your life begins and ends with your family, and even though I am choking on the words I am very happy that I have an awesome brother like Clay........there I said it. So Clay old buddy if you ever read this yeah I do pick on you about how dumb you are and call you names I still love and care about you :), Love your sister Lexi XOXOXOXOXOXOXO (because I know you hate hugs and kisses from me )









bullgirl104 bullgirl104
18-21, F
2 Responses Jan 11, 2013

but ericas basically a kid why would he send her instead of clay?

He could send you- no i take that back, you would probably do something to the bull

It was funny how your dad said he would send Erika to get the bull.