Feeling Hated

Hi could really do with some advice please. I feel like everyone hates me!! Work is a massive problem for me. I have suffered with depression and think that everyone now thinks I am week and likes to make fun of me!! I now think that everyone hates me and doesn't want me to be there. I feel I can do my job very well but with this lack of confidence I feel I am doing not a good job compared to my colleagues. We now have a big shift around in work and might have to have an interview to find which area I will go in to and I think that I will be put in the area that I don't want as people don't like me and think I am a freak because of my depression!!! I don't want to say anything to work as I don't want them to think oh here we go again with her!! I have no evidence to back all this up this I'd just what is in my head and I can't get it out. It's getting me really down and effecting my home life. What can I do and help would be greatly appreciated.
Lilyplant1 Lilyplant1
31-35, F
2 Responses Jan 23, 2013

Hi, I am just wondering if anyone ever said anything to you about your depression? Where did this fear come from? Remember depression is an illness and many people are caring, even at work

Hi thanks for replying again. Yeah on medication for depression been to counselling and stuff and it works for a curtain amount of time then seems to fad away ! Not really sure where it all came from I was bullied when I was little maybe that. However it has become worse of late to do with being hated thing.

Maybe you could somehow speak to someone at work before you go back, maybe see how they feel about you...it would be a way to check it out before you actually go back, and maybe then you could stop the worrying

Hi Lilyplant, you have depression so it's natural you feel down on yourself. In fact that's a symptom of depression so don't be so hard on yourself. How do these people know about your depression? I have found writing the bad thoughts down helps, because you see on paper how ridiculous they can be, while just telling yourself to stop thinking things...

sorry i forgot to finish my thought lol, stop thinking things just doesn't work.

Hi clouds thank u so much for replying. I will try writing things down I have tried that before and it helps for the time I write it down but then it all pops back into my head and I am back to square one!! My colleagues know about my depression as I was signed off work for a month and its been on going for a long time!!! I feel such a freak!! I unfortunately wear my heart on my sleeve and have told people when I have been really down (wish I never now) I feel the only way I could get out of this is if I move jobs but I am on good money and there is just nothing out there 😔

I proberly should also mention I am on maternity leave at mo not back for another 4 months. So I am not there at no which I think makes it worse to as all these changes are going on. But I have felt like this for a while even before I went on maternity but its got loads worse now. I am going back and fore work as I have to do a course don't no if that's helping either.