What Did I Do Wrong?

I think everyone at school hates me.


They don't want me around. They act like nicey-nicey at first then they do this to me. I think they don't know my feelings of rejection and hurt, they just care about themselves. They talk about me behing my back, their smiles are FAKE! They act friendly but when i turn my back, they glare and look at me badly. If i say something real, they won't believe me. They always let me take the blame on things.


Then they betray me after all the things i've done for them. They acted so well, it makes me wanna die. I think alot about transfering schools so i can forget about those people who have hurt me and find real people who can be really great help for me.


Some of them say that it's because i'm spoiled nad i act cool and popular. My attitude is bad and that i embarrass them. How did i embarrass them?? And even if i did that, don't they embarrass me sometimes too?? they don't know how i feel.

One girl said something about me through a comment and she wrote there that 'I;m not looking for a fight, i'm just saying how i feel. And i know if i told you this face to face, you would have just embarrasses me... i know that cause i know you'


She says she knows me, then if she really knew me she would know that i would have never embarrassed her!! and how could i have embarrassed her after she said so much bad stuff abotu me that hurt me more and more. I would have just ran away if that would have happened. I'm not that low of a person to do that.

losingmyfriends losingmyfriends
18-21, F
13 Responses Sep 28, 2008

I hope it's gotten better over time. But really just stop. Stop wondering why because you will never find an answer that feels good enough or you. Try to find a group of people with morals you admire or you think you are similar to because I'm betting that 'everyone' is a small group o people who seem to be 'popular' but really there are many more groups of people in school. So widen you're view of people. That way i it continues you have some allies. I that doesn't work try to see it from their perspective or forgive them for feeling they have to criticize you for their misgivings ( as they most certainly will have some). Accept your imperfections as we all have them as well as your strengths and accepting them allows you not to care what they say. Surround yourself with people you like and extract yourself from situations and people who have negative energy for you.<br />
I know it sounds hard and it does take effort but I've been in your place and worse. Toughen up and fill yourself with positive energy - it worked for me. Good luck.<br />
Alternatively you could just be exaggerating and being a drama queen. if so you've wasted a lot of peoples time so grow up.

dood, <br />
i am also passing by the same situation , everyon hates me now a days but who cares about these looser, tachy, bimbos . whatever they wants to think ,yes , they can but if they came in my way ,i will kill them ,at my back whatever they want to say or whatever they want to do ,yes , they can ,in doing such silly things they are just wasting their time . if they want to waste their time , let them, what can i do in that. i just want to concentrate on my studies ,nothing more than that. BYE!<br />
Good Night.

I remember being in high school. All those people that teased me or made me feel awful. They dont exist in my world anymore. Thats the thing with highschool a few years after you forget those people and they become nothing to you. <br />
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But you shouldnt let yourself be bullyed we are all human beings and somehow where all equal no one deserves to be bullyed. Even though we have different personalities and looks we shouldnt be targeted for that.<br />
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Theres just to many people out there that think they are better than everyone else. to many people that are liked for being mean. And the nice people get left out its such a strange world. But no one deserves to be upset we are all deserve happiness no matter who we are. :) xo

I feel like you just typed my life story. <br />
I cry myself to sleep nearly every night thinking a new day will bring a new friend. It doesn't. It never does. I always feel as though I have done something when i know I haven't and i fear that if I move schools the same thing will happen again. <br />
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I always hear things about what people hate about me and I try so hard to change but I can't help but feel as though I am who I am and wonder why that isn't good enough. I know I have annoying aspects to my personality but I never thought it would escalate to bullying, suicidal thoughts and misery. <br />
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Its too much and i don't what to do.

Yes, I am going to a small school for teaching and I have this same problem. I really don't feel like i did anything but I feel like people just pick on me. I am good and courteous to everyone in my class, I respect them and listen to them and honor their thoughts and feelings. but sometimes people can just be cruel to me and criticize what i eat or how i dress or what i say and its really unwelcome feedback. I really don't want their approval to dictate my choices and behavior, I choose those! For example, i ask a question in class (i know i ask good questions because all of my report cards from kindergarden through high school have said so) a few students will act like they know the answer when they don't and they will give an answer to me before the teacher, and the answer they give is the most generic answer in the world, it doesn't answer my questions or it is an answer to a different question. I know, a particular student, I feel hates me for no particular reason. She is always talking behind my back. I feel like I have no friends sometimes, like I am nice to everyone but I can't be in a particular group because I cannot conform to their particular norms of my behavior. In other words, I have to sacrifice my morals, my thoughts, my personality in order to be accepted by them and I like got over that mentality in middleschool. I know I am not the only one who feels this way. I just wish it was just a college thing.

yeah it's just pretension and immaturity of high school life. toughen up, suck it up and move on, it's how things are. the less affected you are about these things, the better everything starts to become. 9/10 both you and the people around you are in the wrong. disliking someone doesn't come unwarranted. maybe you do need to change yourself, your atttitude and your approach and perception on things, not for them, but for yourself. besides, who give a **** if everyone hates you. i mean who are these people? they are nobodies in a cumulating universe of nothingness, a mere spot in the grand lull of things.

anyone in college with this problem?

Sounds like you suffer from hypersensitivity. I know that feeling so hard not to get hurt by comments and know really understands that. But trust me you aren’t alone or strange by feeling like this lots of people do but do show it. I find exercise and spending time with those people that make you feel happy helps. And as hard as things get try and make a extra effort yourself to keep things pleasant between those people that do make you feel good as some times it easy to take frustrations out on the wrong people and they really do find it hard to understand why!

what do you think, mother??

i know.. <br />
that's why i jsut wanna fast forward my life to college...<br />
i'll take one step at a time... XD<br />
i'll make sure not to really be popular or so...<br />
people think that i'm a good friend but they say that i'm self-centered....

thanks for your help guys...<br />
i'll try my best at school...<br />
hopefully it won't get worse...<br />
try and make peace with them!<br />
i'll find someone to open up to...<br />
maybe someone hereon EP

You poor thing! I cannot tell you how much I feel for you, because I went through the same thing at your age, and I DID transfer schools. I am sorry to tell you this but women can just be down right mean. I am thirty one, and am finding that the way that they behave in high school really isn't so different than how they behave fifteen and twenty years later (just read my story that I posted!). As a result of that I have always had a tendency to have more male friends than female friends. <br />
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YOU HAVE NOT DONE ANYTHING WRONG! Do not start believing that, because it will effect your self esteem. I know, because that happened to me. I suffered with a lot of self esteem issues in my life specifically because of the very problem that you are describing, and I do understand how much it hurts. And, I have to admit that it still does hurt me. I often think, "Why does this person not like me? What did I do? I've always been so kind to her." <br />
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But, the logical part of me, the part of me that has acquired wisdom through age reminds me that the problem is not me. If you always do the right thing (which basically translates into: treat other people the way that you wish to be treated)-then the problem is NOT you. The reason why people have treated you this way is because deep down inside those people feel insecure, and there is something about you that they envy-it reminds them of that deep down insecurity that they have. It could be anything such as the way that you look, the clothes that you wear, you are a very kind person, you are intelligent, etc. You have something that they feel that they lack, and that is why they treat you this way.<br />
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Changing schools may or may not work for you. It didn't for me. As I said, I still deal with this kind of bs. I have just learned over the years that if I have done nothing wrong, and treated that person the way that I want to be treated then that person is the problem, and it isn't my problem. If you ever need a friend, or need someone who understands to listen to you then please feel free to send me a message anytime:) Like I said, I REALLY do understand this. <br />
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I want to leave you with a quotation that I discovered a few years ago that helps me to this day when I start feeling as you do right now: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented or fabulous? Actually who are you not to be? Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won’t feel unsure around you. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” -Marianne Williamson

yeah, i'm in high school....<br />
it's really hard and full of hurt.....<br />
<br />
i wanna transfer schools...<br />
and it's for the better...<br />
i don't know if my parents would allow that...