Fb Is No Place For Loners
Posted November 17th, 2009 at 3:22PM
I only went on it because my friend pestered me too. Couldn't really see the point because she was my only friend. Anyway went on and made friends with my old so-called school mates, you know the type that never really bothered with you when you were at school? Well since i left school things haven't been great and when one of your old school mates is a solicitor and asks what you've been upto, saying that you've spent some time in a mental hospital just kills the conversation.
Everybody's lives just seemed so perfect, they had good jobs, lots of friends, earned loads of money blah blah blah. Well i suffer from depression anyway but after going on fb i'd feel suicidal.
I tried to make friends with a lad that i was in the same class as because i new he was friends with my friend (you know, the only one) and we both sat near him. I got a message back that he can't remember me. So i described myself to him, told him who i was best friends with and the replie was 'sorry, i remember her but not you'. Typical of my life. I immediately cancelled my sad crappy account. At least on here there's people who 'get me' and don't make me feel like a loser.
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That sucks! I have contacted 4 people on Facebook. I tried to explain to my old best friend that I was sorry I wrote her a letter while drunk 15 years ago. After the letter, I never heard from her, and I thought that was the end of the relationship. I did quit drinking, I told her. I wrote that 3 weeks ago and she hasn't said a single thing on my wall. I found out my college boyfriend makes small films. Just what he wanted to be when he grew up, a film maker. I don't know how to feel about that. I haven't written on his wall, but he made me his friend. I don't wanna be friends, I was just curious! I was hoping for some kind of closure with these two, but nada.
I'm sorry you have had bad experiences with Facebook, but it don't matter in the long run. I think you're a class act. Forget those fools! -
Oh, yeah... The people you contacted have probably had their downs as well as their ups. They just didn't have the guts to write about them, maybe! :)
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Well i've just found out that one friends girlfriend has run off with his mate and another is just getting divorced. Must of forgotten to put that on their status.
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i have been on facebook for 2 years and since finding EP, i must say that i also prefer it here. i can take off the mask that i wear every day and just be who i am. the thing with facebook is that everybody knows you as the person that you let on that you are. if my deepest secrets ever came out on facebook, i'm sure that i would lose many friends. here you get to know a person as who they really are. i think it's the best thing on the internet. what i'm saying is simply that EP is much better. i only use facebook for the games mostly. i can understand about the hospital being a conversation killer. it sucks but here people don't really judge. EP forever!!!
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Yep, people on EP don't judge. We are here for comfort and we can be who we are. I totally agree with you flight, I'd lose many friends on Facebook if I'm honest about my situation to them.
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I know what you mean. I hate FB too. It makes me so depressed. Everyone looks so happy and they're always talking about their plans with their nine million friends. I have a FB but I rarely get on for that reason. Just remember that they put all that **** on there because that's what they want everyone to see. It's immature and annoying that everyone feels the need to post nine million pictures every night they go out. Screw them. FB is so lame anyways. :)
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Couldn't agree more Timide. It's all posturing anyways I much prefer the vibe on EP (sorry i used the word vibe lol) :0) -
Absolutely. It really IS what they want you to see....not the truth. On my friends list only me and my best friend are real with our postings. Bragging is a strong sign of insecurity. And IMO it does not make their **** smell like roses. -
I totally agree Timide!
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IMO Myspace.com and loners-club.com are friendlier place..
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I so agree with that statment. I have just discovered EP and I am actually thinking I'm going to prefer this than "Fakebook"
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I feel the same way, only I believe that it's easier to prefer something newer. Kind of like preferring facebook to myspace when it first came out, or preferring twitter to facebook because celebs are on their now.
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That name sounds more appropriate Keeper.... "Fakebook"..... i like it!
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"Fakebook" a more appropriate name there could never be for something!
I just get ignored there. It sucks. I would love to leave it, but I share the profile with my H. If I took my name down, there would most likely be a flurry of gossip. No thanks. So, instead, I just avoid it the best I can. -
u r far from a loser!!!!! we all have problems. those idiots just make there lives sound great, but they hide behind there lies. facebook s@cks anyway, i have an account dont even know wahy its so lame. u r special never 4 get that.
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Don't worry destry, i get ignored on there too.... i'm like 'billy no mates'
Thanks Destiney... your special too *hugs*..... your right, Fake Book is lame. EP makes you feel at home and the poeple are just great, well most of them ;) -
If you don't like fakebook, just quit. I committed facebook suicide today actually after being mildly "successful" on there, i'm satisfied in finding out who's banging who and marrying what, it took up so much of my time stalking people i used to know and sniffing around their lives on FB i just discovered they all have patterns and routines in their boring lives, their updates having the same flavour about whatever and as time goes by they go from school to college to work to engaged to married to getting a home and having children and pretending to be excited about it, at each step.... boring!!
My star is falling and if i have the outlets i tend to use them to vent, so I wasn't going to update people on the view on the way down as i become nothing, so leaving now was the right time for me. -
Your story sounds exactly like mine. A social commentator I heard on the radio the other day mentioned that social network sites have the same effect as the class room heirarchy, and the only way to feel comfortable on facebook is to be the type of person who conforms to the group. this really spoke to me and made me realise that this was the mentality that I had tried so hard to leave behind all those years ago. If you view facebook as the absolute lowest common denominator, you will realise that people like you and I are above this mindless drivel and it is the equivalent of the fan ba
se to a tacky sitcom. you are not alone in feeling alone, believe me -
*Applauds* KathKennedymelb. You are soooo right!
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Amen!
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Hey, you just joined aswell! Not as good as it's cracked up to be is it?! xx
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I love you too sis! *boobie squeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssssh*
(your the only one keeping me sane right now and i love you for it) -
Exactly the reason why I DON'T have a FB account. Don't worry Ever, those people obviously aren't worth your time. *HUGS*
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Exactly Lotus! *big hugs*
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face book reminds me of a public ring like the roman colosseum, where people try to make themselves the spotlife of our age. It seems like a total waste of time and effort to mantain such an account.
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I have a facebook account because my friend talked me into it, too. But I'm starting to regret it. What you said "Everybody's lives just seemed so perfect, they had good jobs, lots of friends, earned loads of money blah blah blah. ", it just gets to me, too. I mean, I'm terribly unambitious and quite easily contented. But being there on FB and seeing those friends of mine w/ perfect jobs, perfect lovelife, etc., it makes me question myself.... like, maybe, I should want more. And I hate how that makes me feel. Like I'm inadequate or somewhat a failure.
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Well your just as good as them echo! It should be called Ego Book!!
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Hehe... Ego book sounds about right. :D.
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You can delete your Facebook. Don't deactivate it. Here's the link of what you should do. http://www.wikihow.com/Permanently-Delete-a-Facebook-Account Wait 14 days, and don't even dare going back, it will activate your account. After that, you should be happier so you can do your stuff.
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I couldn't agree more with how facebook can make a depressed person worse. It indeed at times has made me feel like my life is worthless. Seeing as I am a loner myself and facebook just does not clash well with me. I was never social so joining a "social network" just brought me lonliness. I try to not be pessimistic and be happy for others, but with the constant cheerful updates about what everyone is doing on their weekend (mine is stuck at home alone) and the vacations or the my bf is so great! I just feel so alone and unloved. I am at a place in my life where I would like to be experiencing such things, but my depression has got the best of me and is holding me back. Whether it's being social and putting myself out there to achieve such wonderful things. I know that anything is possible, but with facebook I am very pessimistic. It makes me not care to compete with such peoples lives. I feel I will never fit into the perfect mold of being a social butterfly with a group of bffs and tons of cool stuff clothes and money. I am an introvert, a loner, but I sure feel like a nobody.
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I'm a loner too, with no friends except my family in "real life" and just a few friends online. Facebook to me was depressing, shallow, and boring...my account's deactivated right now, though I might reactivate it sometimes to stalk people when I'm bored, lol. EP is a gazillion times better, at least when you know how to mostly avoid the dark and weird groups/people. :p
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Trust me - you don't have to be a loner to feel depressed by FB ;)
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Wow I thought I was the only one who felt this way about Facebook. I too have experiened the fakery and fronting that left me depressed and comparing my own life unfavorably. I have a co-worker with over 600 "friends" (how is that even possible?) and her wall was a constant flurry of parties, trips, etc. However, I later discovered that her marriage was falling apart, she was drunkenly hooking up with random men, etc! Her whole "social butterfly" persona was an facade to escape from her deep real-life problems.
I had another Facebook friend that would make comments on how much $$ they were spending on renovating their kitchen. This struck me as extremely insensitive, considering that many of us are just trying to scrape by in these tough times. Tacky, tacky.
I found that I was spending too much time fretting about my FB status, comparing my friend count to others', etc. Finally, I deactivated my account and it was the best thing I ever did. I now don't think about FB at all,(except when someone mistakenly thinks I unfriended them and I have to explain that I really didn't). Not thinking about FB on a daily basis has removed a huge source of anxiety from my life, and I couldn't be happier about it.
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