Most High

We should take the time to ensure that when there is no one else there is family. 

Family should be where we go to always know we are loved and feel protected.

What has happened to the value of family today?  Why are there so many broken families?  Why are there so many lost from their families?

How do we find the way back to families being held as the most high value in our lives?

Grits4life Grits4life
46-50, F
11 Responses Feb 24, 2009

One of the reasons for high divorce rates is because of the U.S. gov't mandated school system. Introduced here in the 1930's by the Rockefellers, it is modeled after old Prussian, Germany's socialist system designed to mold and control people. Some of the systems ob<x>jectives are to destroy family values, produce a population of: employees to work for corporations, soldiers for the gov't and the war corporations, professional consumers, people incapable of forming an opinion or thinking for themselves. Judging by the state of this nation I believe the program is thriving to say the least!

it is not that women should be the ones to miss due to mom duties it more often than not seem to happen that way. I have no issue with men cooking dinner or taking off to do "dad" duties. this does happen.<br />
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yes i do see gender specific roles for men and for women. We are equal in the sense that we are created by God. but if were to be equal in every way there would be no need for Man and woman there would be just one.<br />
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I am a firm beliver in that women do have a specific role and so do men. It is the way we were created and why we were created. We are to complete/comliment each other. If we go against what we were created to be then we do not function as we should. <br />
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My idea of letting movements bearing fruit on their own may seem crazy to you but we will never know the answer due to intervention to force it to bear fruit before it is ready. Either way you can't force a maple tree to bear apples when it is not an apple tree. The apple tree will bring forth apples when it is ready and not before.

I was going to agree to disagree and stop posting here, but your post begs more questions. I'll leave this story after this post. <br />
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You're argument against equal pay might make sense...until you wonder why it is that you blindly accept those gender rules. <br />
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Is there a reason that women *should* be the ones that miss more work due to Dr. appointments for their children and such? What is wrong with the dad missing a little time from work to do these things? Is he by default not as good at these things because he's a man? Why can't the woman be flexible about staying later at work? Is it because she's the one to cook dinner? Why can't the man cook dinner? <br />
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The only logical difference between the sexes is due to the fact that a woman can get pregnant and miss some work because of that. That's it for actual differences, as opposed to the perceived differences you see. <br />
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If you start with the pre-assumptions that women are going to miss work for "mom" duties but that dad won't miss work due to "dad" duties, then ya, maybe your argument makes sense. <br />
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I think the fundamental disconnect between us is that you don't view men and woman as equal but different genders, you view them as having gender specific roles (woman can't stay at work late, she has to go home and cook, man can stay late at work, etc) It's like you have this blind spot when it comes to discussing gender roles. <br />
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Also, we've had this discussion before, but I find your views on the irrelevance of laws in regards to movements (such as the civil rights or suffrage movements) to be astonishing to say the least. Public sentiment does change before laws come about, that's how laws gain support. They reinforce each other. But public support alone without law and legislation will never deliver real change. Just because folks get a crazy idea that women should be allowed to vote because they have brains like men, well it doesn't matter until they utilize that public support to pass a law allowing that to happen.

I don't look at our history the same way that you do. Women who needed to have always been able to work to support their families. Equal pay. There is no real equal pay for anyone. I undersand why women tend to make less than men for the same job.<br />
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For example let take a man and a women doing the same job. both in good health. both married with children. both the same age and both in a two family income.<br />
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You own the company. Both work for you. Both do the same job. You pay the man 40,000 a year and the woman 32,000 a year. both recieve matched 401k and health insurance. both receive 2 weeks paid vacation, and are allowed 4 sick days a year. Both receive pay on a salary basis. Hours of work are 8 to 5 and with a 1 hour lunch.<br />
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On average between the two the man will miss less work due to sickness. Why?<br />
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Women tend to have to need more time off due to "womens issues". They more often are the one's to take children to doctor's visits and be at home with them when sick. When the child needs to be picked up early or checked out due to sickness the women is the one who more often is called to do this. Women tend to be the one to drop off in the mornings so she is more often late to work.<br />
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Now with women tending to be the one's to deal with these things you as the owner of the business will get more productivity for the man doing the same job. He will more often stay late when needed and is more often more flexable due to the "home responsibliites" not resting on his shoulders.<br />
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When you look at it from the business owners side how is it wrong to pay one worker for actually working an average of 37.5 hours a week compared to 41.5 by the other?<br />
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this is not to say that it is this way across the board. Yet in all the places I have worked this is the norm. It is even harder on women when they are single mothers and there are more demands on them outside of work.<br />
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I am also a believer in that many grass root movements were already on the way in our history before the government passed laws for them. Even with the laws it still took additional time for these things to go into effect and be accepted. Therefore, with them already moving the movement would have continued with or without the government. People do not always need a "law" for them to do what is right. Either way it takes time and an acceptance for it to work.

Ok, but quick question, did I mis-represent your views in my last post? <br />
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I'm curious if you actually think our society was better off when men and women were no where near equal, when women couldn't even vote or stand a chance to make a living on her own, but divorce was rare. Are we better or worse off than we were then?

whutt we are two very different people. My trying to explain to you my way of thinking is a useless point due to you not having my same value system. I understand your reasoning and why it is what it is. That is your choice and in many ways the choice of many others. I however do not share much of what you show as your values and beliefs in the stories and comments you post here.<br />
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let's just agree to disagree.

So you are saying the two things have a direct relationship, that women's fight for equal rights leads to all the bad things you listed. That's a remarkable statement. <br />
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It is similar to a black man saying that he hates the results of affirmative action, so he would like to return to the stability of slavery. <br />
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Do you then yearn for 19th century America, where you couldn't vote? <br />
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You're throwing out the baby with the bathwater. Instead of ensuring equal rights and then dealing with issues you say come about because of that (which I'm not at all convinced is an accurate statement, I don't see how women's lib ends up "enslaving" women), you would just scrap the quest for gender equality because of its side effects.

What do you think are the causes of all the ills you list?<br />
to answer this...<br />
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the mentalilty of "I" first in all things. Sex is a "do it with who ever, when ever, and as many as you want.<br />
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Real commitment "for better for worse, for richer for poorer" why go that far when "I" deserve is the reason for decisons. <br />
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Do I think "equal rights for women" has something to do with the bad things listed in my story. yes it has in many way. equal rights in my opinion did not liberate women it has enslaved them. If a women does not agree with the womens movement then she is blacklisted. Yet from where I see things when you write down the pros and the cons the cons far out reach and number the pros not just for women but for children as well.

If you have any doubt about my feelings on the genders, you can read this story of mine and the discussion that followed...http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e=459656<br />
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Those things you mention are bad, I wouldn't argue that. They only illustrate how far we have to go. <br />
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However, we must look at the causes for things. You don't view the empowerment of women as a bad thing, do you? Some women do, so I must ask. <br />
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You write "this and more for the right to divorce and to have equal pay in a job."<br />
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I admit I'm confused by this statement. Are you saying that the right to divorce and have equal pay is somehow related to these things you list? <br />
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My point in bringing up the divorce rate is that appearances can be deceiving. High divorce rate doesn't automatically mean that marriage in previous generations was "better". You must look at all sides and causes. <br />
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What do you think are the causes of all the ills you list?

whuttup as a women I feel even though you say such nice things about how far women have come I can agree with the advancements on the surface but behind all of that we are more inslaved by men then ever before.<br />
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teenage pregancy is higher now with all theses wonderful advancements<br />
stds for women of all ages also higher due to the advancements<br />
**** industry has grown faster than any other industry in history due to these advancements<br />
abuse of women and children has risen from these advancements<br />
young girls as old as 9 and 10 are now having active sex instead of playing with dolls and having no clue what blow jobs are<br />
women and children are being sold and kept inslaved for the pleasure of men<br />
abortion is an everyday event and looked at by many as no different then having a tooth removed<br />
women are used and encouraged to be openly sexual because they have the freedom to be....<br />
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this and more for the right to divorce and to have equal pay in a job.<br />
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to me either way you spin it women are still viewed as property and for a mans pleasure.

Many people wonder about the high divorce rates we see today and think it means our society is crumbling. That's certainly one way to look at it, but I would suggest that the increase in divorces isn't the boogeyman that so many portray it as. This doesn't mean I'm a fan of divorce, I'm just going to point out a few things. <br />
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Decades ago, divorce used to carry a stigma that it no longer does today. It was very rare for a couple to get divorced due to this social stigma and shame that was associated with it. One of the primary reasons that so many more marriages end up in divorce is because of the empowerment of women. <br />
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A century ago women did not have equal rights with men. Women depended on men to provide for them. They might be able to get a little job to help make ends meet, but men were undoubtedly the financial rock of the family unit. <br />
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Today we are still fighting to ensure women get equal pay for equal work. Some Republican congressmen actually oppose such measures to this day. Regardless of this fact, women have made gains in respect to their rights and their abilities to provide for themselves. Pay is not always equal between the sexes, but it is much closer, and it is no longer absurd for a woman to choose to live her life single. <br />
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Many miserable marriages "stayed together" in previous decades for this reason. Women did not leave abusive situations, because they had no better prospects and the associated shame of divorce was too great to justify leaving. <br />
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Is the situation like the one I just described more moral than a divorce? Due to greater equality between the sexes and greater opportunities for women in the workforce, many more women are no longer frightened away from leaving a bad marriage. <br />
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In our not too distant past, women never filed for divorce. Why would she say goodbye to her source of income and say hello to a world which despised her for being a divorcee? <br />
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Men used to be the only ones that really filed for divorce. Our divorce rate was bound to go up when you double the # of genders which are filing for divorce.