Could Everything Simply Be A Passing Fling?

Never found true love.... almost 30 now. how do i know?
well... i'm single. Figure that should be enough explanation.

Even through so many relationships... where all i felt i was doing was giving. Sometimes some, sometimes equally, and many times more than the other person.
but.. just never seemed to be enough.
So after one final relationship (or at least, the last one), I decided to live for me... love for ME.. and so on.
what's the outcome?
about 2-3 years of not even something as simple as a DATE. even as friends.

I didn't think I was a horrible person... or an *******... or even too ugly to be found attractive. But i can't lie and say these thoughts haven't crossed my mind.

But i'm still told i'm one of the nicest guys... or that i can almost care too much about others... or (god forbid) I get called hot.

so what is it then? am i just destined to be single?
Maybe it's not that I'm not good enough... maybe it's just meant to be.
I guess not all self-reflections come with an epiphany, or even a happy end.
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1 Response Jan 10, 2013

I'm in the same boat as you are, my good man. Single for 3 years and counting, and though the single life does unmistakably have it's perks, it also has it's downsides. It's lonely. Even with friends, there's this desire to progress a relationship further, where you can be intimate and let down your guard with someone and express yourself and open up to someone in a way where you cannot in a strictly friend-based manner. I’ve been in three long-term — “long term” = “monogamous relationships. Each ended on a very bad note. The reason? Well, we wont get into that. However, I do have my personality quirks and it's always seemed to work it's way in my relationships, somehow. Before I go any further, I wont say I'm entirely to blame. I began to acknowledge that certain factors regarding my job, inability to go to college (financial reasons), lack of social skills, etc. played a contributing factor.

But enough about me. This is about you. My word recommendation would be to not be pessimistic just because you've been dealt a bad hand. Despite the fact that I've had some very long-lasting relationships which didn't pan-out well, it hasn't discouraged me and I still try hoping that my efforts will at one point pay off. I want to see if there's such a thing as having a genuinely good relationship which can last. Above all else, I long to experience it and meet the right person.