Here Are The 8 Signs That You May Be In One

1. You look forward to seeing him/her with more excitement than a typical friend, and spend more time with him than you should.

2. You find yourself dressing up and paying more attention to your appearance in a hope that he'll notice you.

3. You confide in him/her about your relationship troubles at home.

4. You flirt with him/her, touching him while talking or making playful comments.

5. You turn to him/her first, before your partner, when something is troubling you.

6. You fantasize about what it would be like to be together in a relationship or sexually.

7. You either talk way too much about him/her to your partner & friends, or you never mention him at all, keeping him a secret.

8. You wouldn't feel completely comfortable telling your partner everything about your relationship with this person because you know some of it is inappropriate.


NotApplicable NotApplicable
22-25, F
9 Responses Nov 27, 2012

All of the above! He even told me I'm the first person he thinks about when anything happens. He said it like a best friend thing but I have a best friend and i wouldn't instantly text her! But I would him!

We have no line, neither of us have friend zoned the other and I'm starting to feel we should set some rules as I often feel they don't apply to us. He's single and I'm the married one. I know he respects that but he brings out my cheeky side which is my defence mechanism!

Aw crap I do all of that concerning a guy at work. My OH works in the same office but we never spend any time together there as we're both too busy. We just email each other throughout the day when we've got a minute.
Trouble is, I look forward to the other guy's emails more than my OH's. I know we wouldn't be compatible in a relationship as he's far too laid back for me but I really enjoy chatting with him. We talk about our bucket lists, music, experiences at uni, travelling, fantasies (non sexual) and heaps of other stuff. When we're on a work night out we always sit together and make each other laugh all the time. I worry that I email him too much so I always wait for him to start a conversation, he only works part time and I actually miss him on his days off. Dear god I need to stop this. I tell myself I just like him as a friend, even my OH half jokes that I have a crush on the other guy/he has a crush on me. He doesn't even know half the time I spend chatting with this other guy. *Groan* this is bad...

All 8 for me as well, and him. I think we've moved past the emotional affair territory and are close to the physical affair territory, though I'm determined NOT to sleep with him (or even do something similar like oral sex). My marriage is dead, though, and I ultimately want to get through the divorce process and be with this new man instead.

How did your marriage die? Is there anything you wish you had done differently?

No touching and no dressing up cause we don't live near enough to see each other. But yes, I would spend time talking to him rather than any of my other friends, and I get very excited to spend time with him. I don't think about being in a relationship with him, because I honestly don't want that. but I DO wonder if HE wants it, and I kinda hope that he does....

I absolutely don't want to end this relationship. I know we couldn't just "cool down" and spend less time together. It would have to be completely cold turkey. And I just can't handle that.

ah now I experience 6 of these things

Deep down I knew it..

All of these but Not #4. No touching except a hug when I leave.

#3, I've told her thing I've never said to anyone else. I've told her things I though I would never had said even if I were fall down drunk.

#6 Oh yes. What if???? She's told me she's not interested in breaking up anyone's marriage. Oh why won't she rescue me???

I've experienced all eight of these. Points five and eight were especially sad. You would think that as a married person, we would feel comfortable discussing anything with our spouses. Sadly, that's often not true.

All 8 for me, ouch.

sorry