The Fat Ugly Girl In The Mirror

I don't think that I am ugly I know I am, I can pin point every unattractive feature on my face. It's not like I can't take the rare reasonable photo, it is more that I know it is just the lighting and the right angle. I hate being so shallow, and the only thing that makes me feel better is to remember I am slightly intelligent, and do my best to be as kind and loving with everyone, animals and people. I know that should be enough yet my physical appearance bothers me more each day. In everyone around me I see their beauty their perfection, their unique attractiveness. Yet all I see in the mirror is the dark marks under my eyes, the weird shaped nose and the nondescript blue eyes my lumpy, fatty body. People compliment my bright red hair, yet to me it's an unruly mass of frizzy curls. I hate getting dressed and often stand for long stretches in-front of the full length mirrors in my kitchen simply wondering how anyone could ever see me as attractive, even though I have a boyfriend of three years and I am pretty sure he does. I think he is looking at me through rose colored glasses. I really need to stop moaning on here, simply having a bad night I guess.
wiccaheart wiccaheart
18-21
2 Responses Dec 14, 2012

Stop moaning! There is nothing wrong with frizzy curls, that is all I have all the time! Also what is wrong with dark circles??? I like my dark circles! Forget what society says you should look like and do what you would like!

sushhh I continuously look like a vampire.... whats not wrong with that lol and it's not what society thinks screw them it's want I want :)

That doesn't make you ugly girl, you have a good heart of loving people and that's it. When it comes to love its not in the look but in the heart, I even love you without seeing you.
There are people with nice face and yet they don't have an inner beauty.
So who do you prefer one with an inner or one with an outer beauty.

I don't know I think the problem is I have met many that are both, not that I am jealous of them... I have beautiful clever friends yet, I can't run away from my physical self loathing, I wish I could wake up and love myself for me. Perhaps one day I will. I can only hope and try.