I Know I'm Ugly

I've always been ugly. When I was young I was scrawny, when I hit puberty I got fat. My biological nationality is unknown and I've always looked different. Flat face, bumpy nose. In high school, a boy pushed me into a locker and called me ugly.

The only time I felt beautiful was when I was on drugs. I lost a great deal of weight and turned heads everywhere I went - not because I was pretty, but because I was disturbingly thin. But I felt pretty.

The doctors replaced my party drugs with anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, mood stabilizers, tranquillizers, and anti-anxiety drugs. I've gained more than 60 pounds and rarely leave my apartment during the day - I'm ashamed of my fat, ugly self.
littlecanadian littlecanadian
26-30, F
1 Response Dec 16, 2012

Don't let the others bring you down! Don't put yourself down! I am sure you have a beautiful personality. That weighs much more than how you look. The difference between personality and looks is personality is difficult to change. If you are a bad person, there is no going back. Looks on the other hand, is ever changing. Be glad that you can change those things. Start going to the gym and eat healthy. Ugly? there are rarely natural beauties....put on make up, dont pale it on, enhence the figures you love on you face. But all needs to start by you seeing how beautiful you can become and believe that. I used to know this girl, i thought she was beautiful, I'd have killed for her curves but she always looked down on herself, boys won't notice her and made fun of her because she was so awkward about herself. eventually, i don't know what happened but she became confident, start losing weight the health way, plugged her eye browns, did her make up and now she got flock of men chasing her.

be happy you are blessed with the things you can change.