Why Would They Lie?It is expected that girls are mean to each other. It's not okay, but it's expected. You can write it off as jealousy and move on. But what motive do boys have to be cruel to girls?
In middle school, boys constantly picked on me. I was called ugly, among other things. I think they were afraid that I liked them, and felt that bullying me was a way to get rid of me. I felt worse after coming to that conclusion; how could I be so horrible that it was an insult to be liked by me?
I don't think most of these boys - it was not a particular group, just many boys in my grade - realize what a profound effect they've had on my life. I was so unused to kindness and decency that whenever anyone showed it to me, I developed feelings for them. I was very vulnerable. I gave every guy who wanted to be with me a chance, even the ones I knew were just using me or wanted to hurt me. I lost my virginity at 14. I know it's not super duper young, but it was younger than I wanted. I lost it to the first guy who seemed to really like me.
I am incredibly insecure. I can't handle insults, even jokingly. It was all too real for me, once. I am now nearly 18, and I still turn into my 12 year old self sometimes. It still hurts.
But I guess there's comfort in knowing you're not alone.
secrettwinkie 16-17 3 Responses 1 Jan 19, 2013