I Can Never Be Pretty

Every day I wake up for school and I have a hard time getting up because I know that no matter what I do to myself, I'm still ugly. I can wear makeup, wear contacts, cute clothes, but my face will still stay the same. my nose looks weird, my face is too big, my cheekbones are too high. I can't stand it when people look at me because I know they are judging me in a negative way. I don't know how I continue to live like this, I just hope one day I will accept myself for who I am or become another person who is beautiful no matter what they do. I know I will never be pretty. and that frightens me a lot.

I have never had a boyfriend and I haven't had a guy ask me out in over a year. I dont know if I just turned ugly recently or maybe I just lost my confidence recently. Every time I look in the mirror I am upset. sometimes I'll have days where I feel okay about myself but then the next day it's right back to where I was before. I'm so tired of people judging me because Im not pretty and seeing them be nice to others who are popular and pretty. Some days I just want to die, but I can't because I love my mom and my friends so much I can't leave them.

I don't know what to do anymore... Im 17

nevergonnaend nevergonnaend
18-21, F
3 Responses Mar 16, 2009

Please, Please please do not do anything rash like harm yourself, becasue you must have read other stories such as mine on people who don't beleive they are beautiful. That much we have in common, at least. I know what you mean when you say you think people are judging you, and you feel like you can't compete, but think of the things you can do that the "pretty, popular" person can't do. Do you have any talents?<br />
It's sweet that you have such a nice relationship with your family, and just think of them when you're sad. That's what I do. And I know it's tough, trust me, I'm surrounded by 6 beautiful sisters, and I have never had a boyfreind and I'm 16, but you may wake up one day and think about how crazy you were to think such dreadful thoughts about yourself. You, yourself are the biggest critic to your appearance, and one day, you will meet someone amazing who will make you feel the way your family does, and make you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world :)<br />
Best of luck!!

Dont drink! But other than that I agree with edgeinslampshade. I have always felt ugly and I know what you mean about hating for people to look at you. But you are on the right track knowing that there will be a time when you accept yourself and see the qualities you have. And other people will too. It is so much more about how you treat people than what you look like. It will get better and better.

Accept it. Being ugly isn't so bad. You get to be in the majority, ya know? At any rate you're only seventeen...there's a lot more life left for you to live. Things will be waaay different when you're nineteen, or twenty, or twenty-five. Do you drink at all? Now there's a good social activity that can be used for meeting dudes and even lowering their inhibitions. Try it--worked wonders for me.