So This Is Love?

Maybe I don't fall in love too easily... Maybe it's just the perception of falling in love or the feeling. The feeling of being swept off your feet and "in love" with someone is like a drug to me, I have to have it. But when I do fall for someone, I really fall for them. It's not me just trying to sate this addiction of mine or me just trying to use someone to get that feeling. When I love someone, I love them with everything I have. If I fall for you, I'm placing all my hopes, dreams, fears, happiness, trust, and heart into your hands. So when I fall in love too easily, by extension I also trust too easily and get my hopes up too easily. You would think I'd have learned my lesson by now. Not to let myself get prematurely attached or give myself up so willingly. It's a set up for disaster, allowing myself to become so vulnerable, I know. But I never learn... And so I continue to get my heart broken and keep getting used. I'm giving everything I've got, but every time I do and someone just rips it to pieces and throws it aside, I've got a little less to give the next time.
grobiegirl12 grobiegirl12
18-21, F
2 Responses Jan 14, 2013

I am the same way. I am 41 and married. It doesn't happen very often because I am very particular and the time it takes me to get over it. But I do the exact same thing you mentioned with the same result. I never felt that way about my wife, I settled cause I thought the other thing was just lust. I have fallen twice in the last 3 years and I long for that feeling again

Same here,I know exactly how you feel, my wife of 4 years, still together, broke my heart, distroyed my happy family, all I do is wonder what I did wrong, its all my fault

Very sorry to hear that... Try not to be too harsh on yourself. Sometimes it's not the initial heartbreak that destroys you; your mind can be just as destructive if not more so. There are simply too many "what if"s in life to know which one was/is/would be the right choice. My deepest sympathies go out to you.