I Just Want A Divorce. I See No Upside To Staying Married.

I have been married for 30 plus years. We have had no cheating. I do have problems with my husband. He laughs at me not with me at least a minimum of a few times a day. He talks over me, we own a business together - and he talks to me in a way I do not think any business partner would tolerate, he is yelling and rude. His attitude is we can do things together that he wants, but will not participate in anything I want. I do animal rescue, he gives nothing to charity and donates his time to nothing but his own wealth, yet he calls me needy and strange for wanting to help save animals and tells people how stupid I am for doing this. We do have a business together. Before I did work in a job were I was so badly sexually harassed a fellow male coworker told my boss, who in turn, was so supportive of me he told me I could fire all of those who did this. My husband, solely blamed it on me - saying I asked for it - to my great disappointment. He was the only one I have known to ever say this. He knows I was brutally and sexually abused by my brother. By the way - I chose not to have those immediately fired but gave them the chance to change their ways. I find it harder and harder to live with him. I just want peace. I would gladly give him the upper hand in our divorce and have told him so but he acts like I am just being a fool. Anyone else in this position?
wantoutnow wantoutnow
3 Responses Sep 7, 2012

What a bastard to suggest you deserved your sexual harassment -esp given your abuse background. I guess if you got raped he'd blame you for it too. He's obviously threatened by you and wants to put you down with whatever means he has at his disposal. Classic, but lame, manipulative behavior.

There are those people who are indifferent to another's suffering, those who suffer in the hands of others, and those who cause suffering and enjoy it sadistically. Sounds like your hubby is the last category.

You have been treated most unfairly in pretty much any relationship with a man, it seems ! Husband, brother, co-worker....as unimaginable as it may seem, you are actually not alone - many women suffer from being in relationships , just as many men do too. I'm sure you've seen at least 1 of Oprah 's shows ! Actually, just look around and you'll realize that the divorce rate is happening just as much as the stay-married rate. Point is that you need to take charge of your life to create the life you want. Millions have taken that exit before you. You have that freedom to walk too. Therefore, if you don't exercise your freedom and continue to live with this man, well, then, you only have yourself to blame. Of course, you must seek legal advice before you take that step [goes without saying]. That too is easy to do now because it has become extremely affordable , thanks to a special service. You can learn more from this site: www.maxpracash.legalshield.com Stay strong.

I too have been married for 30 years. All I want is out. My husband was abusive and controlling for years. Now that he knows I have one foot out the door he suddenly loves me. He doesn't love me, I am simply something he owns in his mind. Life is short, I have wasted my adult life with this ma (I married him at 18). I am not willing to be miserable anymore. Good luck to you.