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Just Had A Baby

dear everyone,

so its been a while since i've been on here. the last time i was active was when i was abuot 2 months pregnant and already contemplating divorce.  Our sweet baby boy arrived in this world in september and is truly the sunshine in my day.  The pregnancy was good however, my husband and i fought alot and now i know that we truly do have issues.  we are now in another "argument" and honestly am so stressed out!!! we have been fighting for the last 5 days now and i see no end.  i'm at wits end.  i wrote him an email today asking for us to please try and talk but was ignored.  i love my son.  i want my marriage to work so bad.  how do i know when its really over? whenever we fight he tells me that he doesn't want to be with me.  i dont know if he really means it anymore.  

 

teachesofpeaches teachesofpeaches 31-35, F 6 Responses Nov 22, 2009

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I just had my son in July and my husband an I started fighting when I was pregnant and iv gotten to the point of hate but I have little reason to! Its hard after having a baby!

People tell you who they are all the time, every day. You just have to listen. If he says he doesn't want to be there...well you posted this a while ago. I hope you let him go. No one deserves that, especially after just having a baby and dealing with all of the changes that go along with adjusting to baby! Good luck to you and your son :)

Peaches- the marriage counselor my husband and I saw said that a child with 1 happy parent is much better off than a child with 2 unhappy parents. AMEN~ my husband died when my son was 5 yrs old which prevented a lot of the issues we might have had and I believe was the answer to the many prayers I prayed for him to straighten out- I think my son was raised well but will not say it was ever easy. Our home was filled with love and my son remembers mostly good memories of childhood. He has told a number of people about us lying in the floor coloring together almost everyday and how much fun that was. Raising a child alone is very hard, but you can do it. Your husband may be a lost cause. If you are constantly fighting it is probably not worth the struggle. Enjoy every moment with your new baby and know that so quickly those days pass- don't miss a precious moment. God bless and keep you!

Try to save your marriage! You sound like you might still love him! That is worth fighting for! Try to take a cooking class together or an art class, that brings out a new side each of you has not seen of the other before! Do get counseling! But the dating scene is no fun! And your baby needs a dad! Is he a good dad?Kids, even little ones, suffer because of divorce!

I say this in a nice way, If he doesn't want to be with you then you both should move on. You deserve to be happy and it doesn't sound like your happy. Does your son hear you fighting? That can't be good for him. Maybe you should try marriage counseling. Whatever you do just stay positive, and put your child's needs first. Good Luck!

you have to follow your heart pet. You have your whole life ahead of you and you have a sweet child as well. i made the mistake of letting my daughter grow up watching a marriage with troubles that were not resolved and it has effected her at 18 yrs old. either go to counselling on your own, and invite him to come, or if you are active in your church, go see your priest/minister. the longer it goes on the harder it will be to fix and heal.<br />
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Best of luck and if you ever want to chat with a neutral stranger......:-) you know where to reach me.