Hear Me Out...

At the risk of sounding inconsiderate or ignorant: I beg you to stop the threat of leaving EP. My reasons are plentiful. And, I am not without sympathy or empathy. My life is an open book via my stories and the people that I talk to here, so these are not jus the spewings of an EP crank.

1) It is a clear cry for attention. Most who do it, never leave and have about 100 + plus EP friends and hundreds more exps. Therefor, they want their parade of friends to come show the support and love, and even beg them to stay. DO NOT GET ME WRONG: I would love to be showered with praise and love too, who would not? Hell, I had many a folk make a stink for my B-day and I loved it...very cool.  But, to force it with threatening to leave a cyber community? Come on!

2) It is a Social Networking Web Locale! You can not leave it...you are either logged on or not logged on. So, when you say you are going to 'leave', keep in mind, that much like a crack addict, you will be back to the proverbial pipe. 1 day, 1 month, or the most likely...you will make another account and create a similar entity and live your EP life under it. Until, you slip up and someone figures out who you are/were.

3) It's one thing to be without the ability to keep in touch, but to willfully make people who care for you wonder and miss you when it was completely un-warranted is just jacked up. You took the time to get to know certain people, and almost as if you had the drama planned you wait for some random incident, an E-incident no less, to take place so you can use that as your excuse to ham-it-up. That is bullshit.

4) This notion of saying 'goodbye': Most likely, anyone who you would say goodbye to, you are close with, therefor has your AIM, Yahoo, MSN, ICQ, an email or phone number of yours! Go take a look at some of the 'Im leaving EP' boards...most if not all of them have logged on since their original posts.

5) EP is here to provide the community with various tools and resources that you can not get on most net locales. For people to intentionally attempt to disrupt what is a pretty emotionally afluent community should be thought about carefully. People on EP seem to care, they are interested in you, they take the time for you! If you have an issue or are in pain, someone is always there for you and often times droves of folk are there, at the ready. So, understand when you threaten to leave, cut, commit suicide, especially when you know the most people are on...(Notice how people dont threaten to leave or cut etc when EP is slow?) You are potentially taking away guidance and effort that can be used more constructively someplace else. Just to satisfy your desire for E-Attention?

6) In the event that someone gets all bent out of shape at me for this commentary, I ask you to examine who it is that usually threatens various EP actions that require the masses to come out and 'save' them. I have had many stories shared on EP that have brought about sympathy, topics covering a wide array of life. I have written on my bouts with Suicidal thoughts, depression, my ex wife, my friends (real life), my past mistakes of which there are many...and never once did I become so self righteous to TRY and halt the entire EP community because of a suicidal thought or a desire to not log on to EP.

I guess I am saying that people need help from time to time, but how many times can people cry wolf before they are given up on? I truly hope that no one gives up on anyone!! Alas, I also hope that people are far more considerate of the efforts of others before the posting of various stories and blogs.

EricS EricS
36-40, M
20 Responses Oct 25, 2008

wow. much longer and way more thought out than my story in the other group....none the less, great post and i do agree :)

Over: EP is a very special place to me. Partially why I am troubled when people trivialize it. Hence this story and me posing the suggestion that folks should not cry wolf so much. You said you were new, let me say: welcome to EP. Have fun bro!<br />
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Thanks for the comments.

I certainly agree. I see exactly what you mean. You obviously took your time to explain it. I have no doubt that it was so that you would not stir up a ruckus are sound rude.<br />
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Probably a good thing that you did make such an effort. In reading some of your comments, you seem apt to be blunt. I just figured it was your way. I can appreciate that. <br />
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I'm still surprised about what I have read today. Being new, your point about this being just another social site is really strong with me. I feel that I am missing something.<br />
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Not to be sexist, but there is a huge difference in the way that women have responded to this situation than what I see from most men. I find that extremely interesting and telling.

"I guess I am saying that people need help from time to time, but how many times can people cry wolf before they are given up on? I truly hope that no one gives up on anyone!! Alas, I also hope that people are far more considerate of the efforts of others before the posting of various stories and blogs." <br />
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That is the summary of the story. :) Be kind will ya..

Kitten: you clearly missed the point of the story and are making it seem as if I have no heart. Re-read it. <br />
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It is not directed at someone who just wants to say goodbye and exchange info with friends etc. Re-read it. <br />
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It is directed at people like 'someonehasamonikerits' who threaten to leave EP once a week and NEVER leaves. <br />
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Toying with friends emotions is foul. Attention seeking for the sake having people beg you to stay is wrong. So, I think. :)

The "understand" comment wasnt for you 'constant'. It was for IT. :P

The only constant: I am talking about anyone who is always threatening to leave. It is a foul thing to do to people. If you want to say goodbye...fine. But we all know of at least 5 people here that bring out the pity parade for attention and praise.... "please don't go!" <br />
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Some guy was doing it all day yesterday (we all know who) and he (predictably) logged on today! Shocked? :P

I do appreciate IT's first comment though

I don't know. I hope you understood my intentions with this story. :) <br />
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The moral of it was to not mess with the emotions of your e-friends because they care and don't want to see anyone go. :)

You agree with the story, eh? Keep that in mind my dear IT. :)

Youngster is fitting. It works... :)

I try...thanks youngster!

Yeah, but Jessie cant leave...SHE IS CUFFED TO KEYBOARD! Eventually you will type your log in info!

Oh stop that crap before I handcuff you to your keyboard-lol

Now that is a touche' Eric............your view is great.

This is very well thought out and written Eric and I totally agree. If you need help and love from your friends here you can just ask for it. Announcing you are leaving as a means to an end is not fair to everyone else here. Its coercion. If you need a break, tell everyone then go. I did it, and when I came back everyone was still there for me. If you really wanted to leave permanently then nothing anyone could say would change your mind anyway. I find the threats kind of annoying to be honest. If you really want to go away, just go.

Hi Eric. I agree with you completely! Especially when after the 50th time hearing it from the same people...you just roll your eyes and say okay whatever...they'll get over it and be back tomorrow or the next day. It definately gets annoying but then I realize how sad it is and how much those people really do need someone steady in their life to say they are cared about. It does sometimes get frustrating though especially if you have your own demons to deal with. *offers hug* But you're so right and I am so glad someone finally had the nerve to say this.

I read your story carefully, Eric, and you make some very valid points. Maybe some people just react a little quicker or stronger to certain catalysts. We don't always know everything that's going on inside them. There could be lots of things that make them want to pick up their toys and go home. That doesn't mean they're being childish, maybe just bored or tired of playing for a while. Sometimes there might be a team member who isn't playing fairly and they're tired of dealing with them. You aren't starting a rukus. You're just expressing what most likely a lot of folks would say.

I appreciate all views, but am worried people are not going to read this story carefully. In no way shape or form am I trying to start a ruckus...I am sure it will be misread or taken out of context. Tis an unpopular view on the status of EP I guess.

I think if I decided to leave EP I would just do it. I do see your point on many levels. This site is here to help people and for people to get to know one another and share stories etc. etc... I mean why tell everyone you are leaving? If they are that upset then why not open up like the rest of us and discuss it. Surely whatever ills them will come to pass anyways. I would rather stay and work through it if I was so upset and thought of leaving this site.