About To Let It Go

I've been in a relationship with her for 6years and she used to love me with everything she had.It all started to change 3years back when she found out that I was flirting online with emails.She said she forgave me and she wants to work things out but lately I feel that she's just with me because of the years we've been together, nothing else.I cant stop thinking that she is seeing someone and i think that is slowly killing me inside.

I dont have the strength to approach her nor ask her if shes doing it or not because I know her answer will be no.I've been unemployed for 4months now and spending most of the time alone.All I think of is what she might be up to.She used to call me all tghe time but now she only calls me once from work when she knocks off.I dont tell her I love her anymore because I dont think she believes me when I say it.She changed her realtionship status on facebook from "In a relationship" to nothing and I keep getting sweet sms from other guys on her phone and she said its nothing. 

I'm not sure if theres something to work out here or i should just let go...I'm tired of being unhappy and i want to be incharge of my life again.

slep slep
26-30, M
1 Response Jul 19, 2010

I'm sorry you are feeling so much pain right now, but on a positive note if you are still together and she hasn't told you she wants to end things, you still have the chance to try to repair your relationship .<br />
You say "she used to love you with everything" till she found out you were having online relationships.<br />
<br />
It might be difficult for you to believe but for many women, the feeling of emotional betrayal when someone they love gets involved with someone else (even just serious flirtations) can be just as painful as if they had caught them in bed with another person, and can leave them feeling unloved and unvalued.<br />
It makes them feel they feel that they weren't enough for you and that you were shopping for a better replacement.<br />
<br />
You also say that you still love her but have stopped telling her.<br />
If you really DO love her you absolutely need to tell her that OFTEN and show it even more often. She needs to see and FEEL that you love and value her and that she can trust you not to hurt or betray her again.<br />
You need to act before it's too late, talk to her, tell her how you feel and tell her how much it hurts that you feel you have grown apart and that you miss what you used to have.<br />
<br />
I know how much it hurts to feel as if you are losing someone you love and I really hope you can work things out.