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I Think Infidelity In Marriage Is Wrong

Sometimes It the Only Way

By: 1972jeep
Written on December 17th, 2008

i am a man how understands the complexity of cheating. I dont blame the cheater of the group wiith full blame if that person is getting what they need they wont cheat. the cheater is resposible for telling there partner that they need things to be happy. it means look at what they are looking for and give that to them. It is not always sex i have found that many are looking for chat,a fealing of selfworth, like someone needs them.the sex is often an after thought. I have many freinds that are cheaters and have been one my self. right or wrong we seek out what we are missing. want to stay strong in your marriage find out what you need and what they need and make shure they get there fill they will do the same = lifetime of happiness and marriage. still married after 20 years. now happy after we figured that out. good luck and god bless

          

By: 1972jeep
Age: 41-45 , Male
418 people have read this story

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  • liveandlearn2000
    liveandlearn2000

    I have to agree and disagree with you. I do agree that each partner needs to let the other know what they need and what is lacking in a relationship, and the other partner needs to really hear and do everything that they can to try to make sure that they meet the needs of their spouse (especially the basic needs of love, affection, sex, companionship, etc). But, I do not believe that just because you may not be having all of your needs met by your partner, that is justification for going out and finding someone else to meet those needs. When you get married you make a commitment and a vow for better or for worse and until death do you part. Sometimes in a relationship things may get really bad and your spouse may not be meeting all of your needs...but that is not an escape route to have an affair. We did not make a vow for better or for not too bad...but if it gets too bad...then I am outta here. I have been in a marriage where we both neglected the relationship and each other's needs. I have to say that I was probably the worse one in the relationship, but it takes two people to make a relationship work and it takes two to let it crumble. My spouse decided that he would find someone else to confide in and invest his emotional energy into and it has done nothing but cause us both great pain. We are now trying to work on our marriage and we are committed to making it work....but when you already have a marriage that is on shaky grounds and has problems.....adding additional problems of infidelity, lying, loss of trust, etc. does not help your chances of making things better....it just makes correcting all of your other problems and issues even harder.



    This being said...I can understand why someone who is in a really bad marriage can consider looking at the greener grass on the other side....but always remember no matter how green that grass is on the other side....eventually it all still has to be maintained.....My advise....maintain your own grass and do not take on the burden of another's work.

    Aug 6, 2009
    1 like