I Think Intelligence Can Cause Depression and Isolation
Growing up as a kid I was always called a nerd because I was more interested in talking about science and philosophy than playing sports. By middle school I was a straight A student and was painfully shy with girls. In High School I finally got a girl friend, she was also one of the smarter kids in the honors class. I graduated valedictorian and attended MIT.
I had multiple suicide attempts by the time I turned 22 but nobody ever suggested I needed counseling and my family was mainly in denial about my problems. It wasn't until my 30s that I had a nervous breakdown and another suicide attempt that I was diagnosed with depression and placed on medication.
I've always felt 'different' from most guys, self-conscious, awkward. I've done a lot over the years to fit in with the average crowd and most people today would probably say I'm smart but not unusual or weird in any way, unlike when I was younger.
I've talked to many other intelligent people that also suffer from depression. There seem to be several theories. One is that being smart and curious is like having a hunger that must be fed. A lack of mental stimulation causes the brain to start 'feeding on itself' and thus depression. Another theory is that intelligent people are often persecuted as children for not being like their peers which leads to low self esteem, feeling different, and ultimately if you already have an inclination to negative thinking it only worsens it leading to depression. Finally another theory is that whatever brain circuitry / chemistry promotes intelligence also happens to promote depression. I can't say what the case is. I know I've learned to deal with my symptoms and manage my depression so my life can still be productive, but I also recognize the importance of controlling my own thoughts, keeping them from leading me into dark places. I've also learned to recognize when my emotions are not tied to my experience - it indicates a symptom of depression I need to control with medication.
I'm interested in studying more about the connection between intelligence and depression. Hopefully understanding will lead to more effective and productive solutions.
- Eljay
I had multiple suicide attempts by the time I turned 22 but nobody ever suggested I needed counseling and my family was mainly in denial about my problems. It wasn't until my 30s that I had a nervous breakdown and another suicide attempt that I was diagnosed with depression and placed on medication.
I've always felt 'different' from most guys, self-conscious, awkward. I've done a lot over the years to fit in with the average crowd and most people today would probably say I'm smart but not unusual or weird in any way, unlike when I was younger.
I've talked to many other intelligent people that also suffer from depression. There seem to be several theories. One is that being smart and curious is like having a hunger that must be fed. A lack of mental stimulation causes the brain to start 'feeding on itself' and thus depression. Another theory is that intelligent people are often persecuted as children for not being like their peers which leads to low self esteem, feeling different, and ultimately if you already have an inclination to negative thinking it only worsens it leading to depression. Finally another theory is that whatever brain circuitry / chemistry promotes intelligence also happens to promote depression. I can't say what the case is. I know I've learned to deal with my symptoms and manage my depression so my life can still be productive, but I also recognize the importance of controlling my own thoughts, keeping them from leading me into dark places. I've also learned to recognize when my emotions are not tied to my experience - it indicates a symptom of depression I need to control with medication.
I'm interested in studying more about the connection between intelligence and depression. Hopefully understanding will lead to more effective and productive solutions.
- Eljay
By:
rpg456
Age:
36-40
,
Male
9
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