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I Think Kids Say the Cutest Things

The Fake Limp

By: RobertaSunset
Written on March 21st, 2012
This morning, just as we were leaving to walk to school, my oldest son suddenly developed a fake limp. Bless him. He was so dramatic and really loud, plaintively trying to convince me how ill he was.

 "OWWWWW!!!! OWWW!!!!!! MUMMMMMMMY........ MY KNEEEEE!!!!!
I CAN'T WALK!!!!!!......"

Since this isn't the first time he's done this, and various body parts seem to get afflicted, I decided the best plan was to try some reverse psychology. I smothered him in equally fake sympathy..

"Ooooh dear, sweetie, does you knee hurt?? I am so sad for you.... Let Mummy kiss it better..... (I got good marks in drama, two can play this game!)

Lol, he milked it for all he could get, so when we got to school. I said how worried I was about his knee and that I was so sorry, he would have to miss his swimming lesson because he needed to come back with me and go and see the Doctor. Lol. Miraculous recovery, surprise surprise!

He burst into tears and then admitted that there was nothing wrong with his knee and he wasn't telling me the truth. We had a little chat about being truthful and how I need to know when he is poorly for real so I can make sure he gets the right care. Lol, 'kidology' is still the best parenting tactic I know of :o)
By: RobertaSunset
Age: 31-35 , Female
217 people have read this story

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16 responses
  • TwilightDream
    TwilightDream

    You are an amazing parent that seems to have it under control. I had to become creative when mine were going to school too. Good job, this was a good one.

    Mar 21, 2012
    1 like
    • RobertaSunset
      RobertaSunset

      Thankyou parenting I am discovering has it's ups and downs but luckily there are more ups than downs, my son this morning said he had magic boxer shorts on that would make him good at karate so I didn't need to worry about bad men... he was gonna protect me lol :o) Always something to smile about lol

      Mar 22, 2012
      1 like
    • TwilightDream
      TwilightDream

      Enjoy this wonderful child and his sense of humor, actually his pure hearted and out going personality while he is little. The teen age years can be more difficul, but not all teens rebel like mine did, lol, but it's even harder when they are old enough and start their own life. It is extremely difficult because then no matter what you know that would be best, all you can do is advise them and if they refuse to listen, then ll a parent can do is watch and sometimes the decisions they make can break your heart. I am still going through that and it has been pure h*ll at times...since you are extremely creative, I think you will do better than I have.... =)

      Mar 22, 2012
      1 like
  • ACuriousStudent
    ACuriousStudent

    lol Love it!!

    Mar 21, 2012
    2 likes
  • kzoodiana
    kzoodiana

    Awesome! Precisely what I'd have done (only I would have added lots of smothering hugs and kisses to embarass the child right in front of the school so he'd tell me to stop and admit he was fine-lol)

    Mar 21, 2012
    1 like
    • RobertaSunset
      RobertaSunset

      I did, I laid it on thick lol :o)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
    • kzoodiana
      kzoodiana

      GMTA.....love ur parenting skills :)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
  • anonimacy
    anonimacy

    Lol! That was delightful! I love these anecdotes.

    Mine was a bit reluctant this morning too. When I opened his door to wake him up he told me "No, mom!! Be careful! Better leave! It is VERY dangerous in here!"

    Mar 21, 2012
    3 likes
    • RobertaSunset
      RobertaSunset

      lol, my sons rooms usually are, toys with batteries on the floor that suddenly go off when you tread on them without knowing they are there... Toy boxes and requests to clean up usually fall on deaf ears unfortunately :o)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
  • kiki1956
    kiki1956

    Kids you gotta love them! Just wait til they grow up so we can tell thier spouses and kids these stories lol. Memories!

    Mar 21, 2012
    2 likes
    • RobertaSunset
      RobertaSunset

      I think they say or do something funny every day so we're making lots of memories for the wedding speech lmao :o)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
    • kiki1956
      kiki1956

      Ha ha cant wait for that!

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
    • avatarunknown
      avatarunknown

      its good you wrote this down. Many of my kids cutest sayings are now lost in the mists of time.

      Apr 14, 2012
      1 like
  • justmeonline
    justmeonline

    If you know any good books on kidology, do let us know. We could all use it I think. Good trick. You got what you wanted, nobody got hurt or frustrated ;-)

    Mar 21, 2012
    1 like
    • RobertaSunset
      RobertaSunset

      Lol maybe I should write the book lol :o)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like
    • justmeonline
      justmeonline

      Well, practise makes perfect, and you're certainly in a position to practise a lot :)

      Mar 21, 2012
      1 like