Are Men Intoxicating Or Intoxicated?

OK men, you think women are hard to figure out, well I will agree with you on that point, but hey so are YOU!! lol

Where did all the *sane* men go? lol Oh i know most of them have written their stories in the sexless marriage thread of stories.

Well one example of *irrational* women I must cop too. As a mother of two boys, the other day I had to try to figure out a way to explain to them what *happy* tears are .... ok I appeared to bean alien to them, and rightly so, lol.

BUT, where are the sane men? They seem to be like the middle class, slowly disappeering, lol. After a marriage that failed I have had the arduous job of DATING again. LORD I am too old for this, grin.

Now OBVIOUSLY I do not mean all men, perhaps it is just the one's I have come across, which means it is time for severe self evaluation, but are there any other women who are expierencing this.

I have met many WONDERFUL men, BUT why is it ALL or NOTHING? lol Is it because as we age, we seek desperately for someone to share our lives with? Maybe.

So from all the 1000s of men I have met since I separated, ok lets say 12, I have found a bizaar pattern, ALL OR NOTHING!! Well I can understand the nothing part but the ALL part scares the hell out of me, lol.

On the dates I have been on, it has either been, nice to meet you see you never again OR please have my child tomorrow!!

A few days ago, I had a mega long ENJOYABLE conversation with a man I met off the internet. WONDERFUL. Maybe something MIGHT come of it, BUT to my surprise (and he is not the first) TOO much came TOO soon. After a 5 hour conversation that went on until 3am, the next day I received FOUR different emails from him and a dozen red roses sent to me. YIKES, women and men, do I run for the hills or just assume that he enjoyed the conversation and got overly caught up in the moment. Oh, he also removed his profile from the site where we met.

I'M CONFUSED!! Is it me? or is that too much and would scare most people away??? lol

Help would be appreciated!! Thanks

AlwaysRemembers AlwaysRemembers
41-45, F
9 Responses May 18, 2007

I wish I knew what you had alwaysremembers and give me some of it because I have the opposite problem none of the men I meet want to commit and thats my pattern every guy I meet is somewhat of a pla<x>yer or a closeted pla<x>yer or just doesn't want to commit period. I wish I had your problem!

Is it possible you are misinterpreting the "ALL" part, I am in a similar situation, I'm 42 divorced and back to dating, including internet dating, which has been fine so far. But I am not looking to date 100's ow women, I am looking for a LTR, so I tend to know very early on whether there is potential or not. If there isn't thanks but goodbye, if there is, I want a relationship that is moving towards a long term situation, however, I expect that to evolve over time, but I may ask questions about long term goals and desires to continue to see if we really are compatible, but it is just part of the learning process, I wouldn't want to move to fast and end up in a bad relationship again.<br />
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But I do know some guys who became dependent on their wives, they can barely dress themselves and shopping for clothing, not a chance, so some guys out there may be so desperate for a new wife (in reality a new maid) that they want to move quickly.<br />
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So I'm just suggesting that you make sure that they are not just looking to the future with there comments and questions instead of wanting to be there tomorrow.

Men ARE intoxicating. Especially when they drive you to drink. But hey. I figured out a long time ago that the most important thing to know about men is that THEY ARE NOT WOMEN. They think differently, their goals are different, they have their own code of behaviour.(mystifying though it might be). Eventually they honour their sacred roles of being provider, protector and wise counsellor in the ways of men.

Actually they were right, in his own words *he was OBSESSED with me* LORD how can you be obsessed with someone you have yet to meet, so i rannnnnnnnn like the wind!! Anyway I have to say that I honestly don't believe that nice guys finish last. I think many women (and i do put myself in that category) go through a bad guy stage, primarily to **** of our parents, but i do think MOST women if they go through that stage, eventually lose the desire to be treated like ummmm DIRT and in the end, tho we may DATE a few BAD guys we commit to the NICE guys. I equate it with how mwn tend to put women in often 2 categories. The one's they would date, and screw the hell out and the one's they bring home to mom ;)

want you secretly - yes. Are jealous that you are happy or might be happy in future - not quite right - its that you may be happy WITHOUT THEM. Its natural to be a little hurt when a friend like that finds someone else. It signifies that thier dreams may not come true. They say be careful cause they don't want to see you get hurt. Yep, nice guys finish last......

OK, so here is ANOTHER confusing thing men have done to me, lol. I have met quite a few men from the internet, many have remained platonic friends. When I announce that I met someone knew from the internet, all my new platonic male internet friends say *BECAREFUL* Lord, that's how I met them!! Intoxicating???? OR INTOXICATED????

Sorry - was never that way. made current wife wait years before proposing and then years before we actually moved in together after marriage, we had been friends first before that for several months after we met. Before that had a girlfriend who wanted me to see other ladies (just never tell her about it - she was seeing other guys). Fine by me. It was a great relationship that lasted years.

interesting. hubby pressed for marriage too. he moved in w/ me after only 1 date. of course, i couldn't be happier..... lol. I didn't know it was a trend though!!

The dozen of roses sounds nice but I am not sure about the whole internet dating thing. Do you have another way of contacting him? Since he removed his profile from the site you met him at I wonder if he may be involved in another relationship? I hate to imply that but it makes you wonder. This may not be the case but I just think people can pretend to be anything when they are on line. I am older and single myself and this whole dating this really is tough. I know what you mean by it seems to be all or nothing. My last boyfriend proposed to me after just 2 months of dating. We were together for 2 1/2 years but we broke up. He kept pressuring me to move in with him and marry him and I felt it was too soon. I have noticed that men I have dated either mislead you because they just want to have a good time and then its like see ya! Or they want an instant commitment! What ever happened to getting to know someone first and taking things slow?