Something To Remember You By...

The only thing I have to remind myself of my visitations to the psych hospital is the permante rug burn scars on my elbows. The worst part is... I didn't do anything to cause them.

It was during the first few days of being there... I was laying in bed and they told me to get up and take my meds. I didn't say anything. I simply laid there, thinking I wouldn't talk to anyone because of how angry I was at finding myself in the stupid hospital again. When I finally went and took my meds the nurse, Dragon, told me that I had to spend 20 minutes in my room because I hadn't taken my meds when told to. I refused to go into my room for something to stupid. I sat in the day room and he told me that he would count to five, and if I hadn't gone to my room he's put hands on.

I didn't go to my room. Like four huge guys came in to take me to my room. See... I'm kinda small, 5'3"... Didn't have much on my bones at that time, I still wonder why it took four guys to take me down. But anyways... They shoved me down on the floor, giving me severe rug burn in the process, and held me down. The way they held was painful.... One arm behind my back at a weird angle, and the other arm beneath someones knee. At the time I had several deep lacerations on my arm and he sat on it... I was forcefully taken to my room and told to stay. I began screaming and yelling.

Dragon told me that if I didn't stop he'd give me pills. I didn't stop. I refused to take the pills. Eventually the four guys came back and they held me down while Dragon shot me twice in the behind. Then they locked me in the quiet room. He had the audacity to come tell me that he was the one in charge and that until I learned that I would find myself inside the quiet room a lot.

Eventually I fell asleep, they had sedated me.

And now I have these silvery white patches of skin on my elbows that remind me of what it feels like to be forceably drugged. I would rather have a mini version of the hospital... One of those little figurines, then have these scars.

KathieRuss KathieRuss
Mar 3, 2010