Ok- I'm done.

I was spending some time with my boyfriends daughter of 14 today, when she confessed to me that he had promised her he would never move in with me.  He has also promised me he would never use me.  If this is true, that means he just intends to date me "til the wheels fall off".  I'm upset, and considering just dumping him abruptly without any explanation.  I feel that he never took me seriously when I told him I was not here to play, after a full month of exclusive dating with him.  GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I want to just scream!  We have been dating for 3 months now!

9 months. I don't know what my problem is, other than terminal stupidity. I'm ending this today, one way or the other.  I'm tired of his little games.
It's gotten to the point where he wont even pull me up against him and cuddle me in front of the tv, and NOW he won't cuddle after intimacy.
My anxiety has reached new heights, and I'm ready to run.  I feel as if I'm either going to break down and cry, or I'm going to end up insane.
I'm not being needy, but dammit, after 9 months, the relationship should improve, especially with all the frigging work I've put into trying to communicate with him. It inevitably leads to him telling me that ALL couples reach a point where they don't touch anymore.  How stupid does he think I am?
I've tried everything from calmly telling him what I want/need, which results in him yelling at me.  He even broke up with me, THEN texts me after I told him "ok, just don't text/call/email me.  I hurt and need time to heal"   what's he do? he texts me....repeatedly, then begs me to let him prove he can be a better man.  I'm finished. I have a key to his apartment, I'm retrieving all my bits and pieces and dropping the key off to his manager.  After that, it's off to the courthouse to obtain a no contact order. I just don't need to feel this way.  I've gone over the top for this man so many times, he doesn't deserve me.

I am not looking forward to my heart aching, and finding things to keep me busy are going to be so difficult.  I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to date or fall in love again, I seem to have some kind of sign on me that says "hey use me for a good time, then treat me like crap!"

Forget it....just forget it.  

lowheart lowheart
36-40, F
Mar 9, 2010