Hostile Angry Husband
I will try to make a long story short.....
in 1998 my first husband, whom I had divorced for drinking and cheating, died in a car accident. We had 1 daughter, then in Dec of 1999 The man who I was married to at the time died in a car accident as well, He was not kind and loving towards me and we had 1 daughter who was 3 months old when he died.
He happened to be a police officer and thats how I met my new husband. The newest husband , was the police officer who did all of the paper work for the city when my husband got killed. We became fast friends and began dating a year after my former husband died. We married 8 months later. I guess it was too soon, We were both infatuated w each other. But soon after things began to change.
I had told him I would quit smoking after we married, but I did not. He uses this against me every day of my life. He constantly puts me down, always makes faces or noises when I get near him, because I might smell like smoke. and that is just the beginning. He likes to try and control what I do. He is constantly shaking his head at me, over simple things, if the phone rings, if I get on the computer, if my family comes over, if I dont drive to his liking, when my oldest daughter walks in the house, when i pick a slot machine he doesnt like at the casino, when I turn on the bathroom light at 5 am to get ready for work, if i watch a tv show he doesnt like,if my shirt is too low cut, if I want to go to my moms. The list goes on and on. He is just not happy with anyone.. He talks bad about everyone, his friends, the people at his church, my family (not his family) my friends, including people he doesnt even know
I cant do anything right in his eyes. He gets mad if I get on the computer, yet at the same exact time he is on the other computer playing games.. There is such a double standard. After I graduated from school and became a nurse I got a new convertible, which he put in his name and he brought the papers up to work for me to sign. So why might he hate my car too, He even spit on it one time. any question I ask him comes with a one word, or arrogant answer, Every day!!!!! I dont think he has even acknowledged my birthday for the last 3 years, even though he should at least get something to give me from my daughter, I dont care what it is!But he never does.. I used to feel hurt all the time but now its just indifferent. I never want to have sex because I know he does not like me and I no longer like him. I dont even care if he finds himself a girlfriend. I finally told him, that our sex life would be better if he just stopped saying nasty things when I smell like smoke. He acted really nice for a few days, then he acted like I was bugging him for sex, I cant win for losing.. He was the one that always wanted it but I would never give in. I no longer go to church with him.
I just want to live a peaceful life. Why talk bad about every one constantly??? He would never ever hit me, he is just mean mean mean with his mouth and actions. Thank goodness there is an upstairs and he can go up there and stay alot.
He talks the same way about his exwife, she stopped going to the same church with him as well. That should have told me something., I guess i was just lonely and scared and he came along on his best behavior. I am not an angel, I cuss, I smoke, I take sleeping pills so I can go to sleep at night so I dont have to put up w him and Im not the best housekeeper in the world, and I talk on the phone alot, wow!!! thats so bad... So I am not perfect, But Damn!!! you would think he would be happy to have someone that would love him if if he loved me, , someone who has a good job, someone who doesnt run around with other men, I dont go out and drink and party with friends and he knows I will take good care of him if he gets sick before me. He is 16 years older and has had 1 heart attack and surgery. I think thats what keeps him here, that and my daughter who is 10, and the fact that my house is paid for. I just dont know, I am tired and sometimes I think It might be ok if I died. But my daughter needs me and I love taking care of patients and my friends at work....What an ***!!!!