In Denial

Iv been with my husband for 8yrs and married 1 1/2yrs. Two weeks ago I found messages from yahoo messenger in my husbands email. What I found and read shook my whole world and everything I thought I knew about him and our life. They were messages from him talking very sexually explicit to other men and using the webcam. These messages were made only 2mths after our wedding. When I finally brought myself to confront him he swore it was only a few times and he loved me and it was the devil and that he is not gay. In the messages he was always trying to arrange meetings with people to get F**** but he said it was all talk and he could never bring himself to really meet someone in person. I don't know what to do or feel or think. I'v been going through sooooo many emotions. One day Im kissing him and loving him and then the next im angry and soooooo hurt. One day I want to leave him and then the next I feel I want to work on things. I feel so sad and lost most of the time and cant believe this is happening to me. He says he is not attracted to men and was just talking dirty cause he was behind a screen. Are there any straight guys out there that understand the situation or is he truly gay/bi and im just fooling myself?.. Another thing is for the past 8yrs he has had a problem getting turned on and having sex; he keeps saying theres something wrong with his penis or him. He only sleeps with me 2 to 3xs a month if that (usually every 3 weeks). Could this just be coincidence or just another sign that he is gay?..
Unlucky2 Unlucky2
2 Responses Sep 9, 2012

I think he is gay But that does not mean he does not love u the way a husband loves a wife my uncle just came out n was married the somehow still togathe n he has a bf that lives with them I dont understand its crazy

Sorry not a week but a month. Thats 2 or 3xs a month..:/