I Think My Marriage Is Over
As Roy Orbison once sang, "It's over, it's over, it's Ooover.....", so is my marriage. Tonight is the night I talked to my kids about it. They understood as they witness my husband jump down my throat the second he walked through the door.
My oldest daughter asked me why he does that... I told her I don't know. I told her that sometimes people think only of themselves and don't ever stop to think about the hurt they cause others - even if it is unintentional. In this case, it's definately intentional and has been for the whole 6 years we've been married.
I told him today that this (the hurtful words) is the reason that I don't care for him anymore. So now it's been said. Those words that can never be taken back. 'I don't care for you anymore.' Wow, I was shocked that it actually came out of my mouth! But I'm glad I said them. Because now he is fully aware of where I am at.
I have been controlled for all of our relationship (8 years together in total), and now it's time to get things done. I'm still not permanent at work, but honestly, I am at the point where I just don't care anymore about that when it comes to my relationship. I want out - and for financial productivity, I don't care if he fixes up the basement as a suite and lives there and the girls and I live upstairs. We will be separate in our lives but this way the girls won't be so upset when push comes to shove and it actually unfolds...
I just feel like a weight has been lifted....
