I *know* My Wife Needs A Good ****

I *Know* My Wife Needs a Good **** ... but she certainly isn't going to get one from me.

I am 49, she is 40. When we were first married just over 10 years ago, I was fit and athletic and was a caring and enthusiastic lover for her. I have an average size penis -- about 6.5 inches -- but I knew how to use it and she always told me that I satisfied her. She loved deep thrusting during intercourse, and I was only too happy to oblige her.

Then, five years ago, the spinal condition (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankylosing_spondylitis) that had been bugging me since I turned forty became much worse, and I underwent several rounds of back surgery. The result is that I have very limited movement of my hips and lower back -- no more pelvic thrusting.

I really do believe that my wife tried to make things work between us at first. I still have my libido, can get and maintain an erection, and ********* the same as before, but I can't **** like I did before. She still loves it when I go down on her and lick her to ****** and for the first months after my surgeries she would perform oral sex on me (not one of her favorite activities at the best of times), but she would complain that I was no longer man enough to **** her properly. You can imagine how that made me feel -- here I was partially crippled, and she was the only victim in her own mind. She resented me as though I had brought this upon myself [It is apparently a genetic condition, but no-one else in my immediate family has it.] But she gets really cranky when she doesn't get good, vigorous sex.

So, perhaps inevitably, she had an affair -- with a coworker of hers who was also a social friend of mine. I was devastated -- I had been trying my best and we had been seeing a counselor -- and she didnt cover her tracks well so it seems that everybody knew about it. More counseling, and she stopped seeing him. But then she had another affair -- with another man in our social circle.

Through both of these affairs, she never ceased to rub my face in her betrayal. She told me how virile and athletic her lovers were, with large, powerful *****. She told me over and over how wonderful it was when they ********** inside her, or how tasty and potent their ***** was when she swallowed it (which she had never seemed to enjoy as much with me -- she always made me feel as though she was doing me a favor, even though I went down on her a lot). It seemed as though she was trying to hurt me in as many ways, and as deeply, as she could.

Our couples' counselor figured out what was going on. My wife wanted me to file for divorce so that she wouldn't feel so guilty about leaving a semi-cripple, and so was pushing me to the breaking point. Once the game was up, she bit the bullet and filed for divorce the following week.

Because there were still strong feelings of love on both sides, we agreed to a trial separation of a year and a day. During this time our agreement was that we could each do anything we pleased with other people. Needless to say this latter part was her idea, and very much to her benefit. She moved in with her best female friend, who was divorced and could use the rent that my wife would pay her. I stayed in our house because it was set up for me to function reasonably well in, in spite of my partially-crippled spine. I could work from my home office and live an independent life.

Durring that year, she ****** dozens of guys. She didn't exactly keep any of it a secret. I considered dating other women, but a semi-crippled guy who is on a trial separation isn't much of a catch (how was any potential partner to know my oral skills on labia and clitoris if I couldn't get that far?). Besides, I was still very much in love with my wife.

I DID find an outlet for my sexual needs -- in a way that rather surprised me -- but this story is about how My WIFE Needs a Good ****, not so much about me. That can wait for another post to a different forum of Experience Project.

We didn't divorce -- after the year's separation we both decided that despite the sexual issues, we are both highly compatible intellectually and have a similar sense of humor. We like the same kinds of music, and during our separation she bemoaned that she had not been to a single good concert once, because the guys she ****** (mostly younger than her) were not chosen for their ability to escort her about town. She also thinks that I will be a good father to the child(ren) that she wants to have -- although we have agreed that I will not be the biological father. The DNA that caused my spinal problems will die along with me.

So, we're living together again. I am not enjoying my sex life as much as when we were first married, but I have begrudgingly come to terms with its limitations and I do still enjoy *******. She is enjoying her sex life more than ever, though. It just doesn't always directly involve ME.

So here is how it works.
  • Before my spinal surgeries, I did much of my own work on the cars, the house, and the garden. Post-surgery, I engage other men to do these tasks for me. [I pay each of them a fair wage for their efforts.]. Society does not blink an eye at this.
  • Before my spinal surgeries, I satisfied my wife sexually like a husband should. Post-surgery, other men fulfil my duties for me in that regard. [I don't have to pay them. Eventually we may need to be generous to gigolos to achieve the quality of sex to which my wife has become accustomed, but she still has a few years of being able to pull hot guys.]
I have, to put it simply, OUTSOURCED INTERCOURSE. Other males, who are fitter, better-equipped, and (usually) younger than I am, have taken over "my" former job, and perform it better than I possibly could right now.

To get back to the title of my Experience: I *Know* My Wife Needs a Good ****:
  • The good news is that she is going to be getting a Good **** in a couple of hours from now. No, not from me, to be sure.
  • The better news is that tonight I am going to be able to watch (not all of her lovers are comfortable with me being in the same room).
  • The best news is... well, I think I'll wait to see if everything goes according to plan. If it's anything like the last time this guy came over, I am going to be very happy. [My wife, and the guy, will be very happy under any circumstances, I would imagine.]
I am a Wittol. [http://www.yourdictionary.com/wittol]. It is not the path that I would have chosen at the outset of my marriage, but it works for me. Instead of being alone, lonely, and jealous, I share the companionship of a woman whom I still find to be very desirable sexually (as do many other men, to my certain knowledge!). I know that she is sexually highly fulfilled, due in no small part to the marital structure that we have set up. I achieve rewarding ******* of my own, and witness mind-blowing ones experienced by my wife. I may yet get to act as a father to a child, although no child will share my DNA.

I am a Wittol. I suspect that many men who have never considered it before, would be happy taking that path.

wittolPaul wittolPaul
46-50, M
2 Responses Aug 11, 2010

We are certainly very sexual beings and taking our pleasure any way we can get it satisfactorily is what's important (to each of us). Cheers to you my friend...

@wolfman445:<br />
Thanks for writing! I have enjoyed reading some of *your* stories, and will comment on them in due course. I joined EP a few months ago, but only recently returned and am very much an EP newbie. My wife has been encouraging me to write about our marital life which, although far from mainstream, contains aspects that are undoubtedly shared by other cuckold couples. <br />
<br />
Update to the story, which I wrote two days ago:<br />
Our special visitor ("Dr. Li", who I think of as Green Hat Guy because he makes me wear one when he visits) came over that evening, and some very intense sex took place on our marital bed. He arouses some very powerful and mixed feelings in my wife, but yesterday she was in a *great* mood -- like the cat who got the cream (ironic, since *she* only had "the cream" for a short period, and *I* ended up digesting it, much to Dr. Li's delight).<br />
<br />
I would have replied to you yesterday, but I didn't want to miss out on the benefits of my wife's elevated spirits following from Dr. Li's visit. So, last night we went out to dinner and then came home and went to bed early. :-)<br />
<br />
We don't have penetrative intercourse these days, but she gave me a "poledance" -- i.e. we spooned, and she ground her naked buttocks against my crotch. I ended up *********** over her lower back; it was nice to have a rare pain-free ****** that didn't just involve me ************!