I Am A Nice Guy

I am a nice guy and it seems like every girl i meet just wants to be friends.  I do not like how I get put in the friend zone so quickly.  My best friend, now, completely crushed my heart after about a month of leading me on.  She makes horrible dating choices (mostly drug dealers) and she keeps getting back with an ex who keeps hurting her.  I wish she would see that me and her are perfect for each other.  She and I have so much fun going to malls and we flirt alot and she knows I care about her.  When ever shes dating someone shes completely miserable, but whenever shes single and hanging out with me she is always happy.  I don't want to change who I am but I hate all of my unsuccessful attempts to find love.  Idk.  I really hate whining about my problems on the internet, but its nice to get this stuff out.
Hank1992 Hank1992
18-21, M
3 Responses Jan 1, 2012

maybe she's scared she'll lose you if anything goes wrong in a relationship? try to prove yourself, maybe one day she'll finally know you're the perfect one :))

Man I know the feeling. All I would suggest is just keep talking to different people and you will find someone who is right for you. As far as your friend goes well that's what younger females do a lot. They usally don't realize it till later down the line they had a good person right in front of them. But by then its to late.

I want to keep my options open but I don't really have any opportunity to meet people. I've never been good at meeting people outside of high school or work. :

Why you say you don't have the opportunity to meet people? You can meet people anywhere. I would suggest if you have any free time go do something you enjoy doing and you will surely see someone there that catches your eye. All you have to do then is have the courage to go talk to her.

Hey Hank,<br />
<br />
I used to always get into situations like this until I was well into my 40's!! I don't do it now. I can't afford to. The damage to my self-worth and self-esteem had all but ruined my young adult life. I will still be polite, kind and caring to new women I meet but I have now learnt to set boundaries. The boundaries I set are not unreasonable boundaries and I find a kind and gentle way of making the woman absolutely aware of what the boundaries are. A woman who encroaches my boundaries knows that she risks losing my friendship.<br />
<br />
I have not changed significantly 'who I am', I have simply found the courage and honesty to communicate to women (who I might see as potential partners) that I will not be used and abused and that there is a clock running!<br />
<br />
Good luck and happy new year!