I'm Definitely Too Nice...

Well, my story is simple.. ever since I hit the dating scene in 2006 I've been way too nice/clingy.  early on the relationships failed miserably but I slowly got better at being more independent and better.. but I'm still falling back into that rut of being too nice and a little too clingy.. I just dont know how to break that habit, even when I'm in the midst of a relationship and I conciously tell myself "man.. here you go again.. bein too damn nice, you need to back off and not do this ****..." I still get too clingy and over-sensitive anyways! its very frustrating and I hope one of these days I'll get this whole nice guy/bad boy balance worked out and have a lasting relationship.

classof2007 classof2007
18-21
9 Responses Feb 14, 2009

as long as the guy is nice to me, that's what matters (: STAY NICE.. it'll pay off.

classof2007 -- the nice girl will come around. I actually married a bad boy... when i was 21. Woah, wrong choice. I thought it was fun, exciting, etc. SO NOT THE CASE. I learned, and now I am divorced and dating a really NICE guy. When I am reading your stories I am really thinking "this guy is awesome, I'd like to meet him and have coffee with him" -- honestly when there's a nice guy, this is where it starts... and you're cute, so I swear a nice girl will pick up on your coolness and soon want to be more than just your friend. If you're young, it can be hard, as many girls look for older men, but really, time is on your side. Good luck! Keep it nice!!

Hey, what's up guy? You should definitely stop being a nice guy. Don't listen to people when they tell you to stay nice, change is inevitable. Regardless if you want to admit it or not, humans are constantly changing. Nice people are generally the ones that are used as a door mat. I'm not telling you to change drastically, but learn to be more assertive and take control.

Don't stop being the nice guy- it's who you are. Just don't allow someone to take advantage of you, though. It's a fine line to walk. The people whe have a mutual respect for you will appreciate your being nice, kind and showing respect for them. You'll know when you meet someone worthwhile to be with- it will just feel right and you won't have a need to dominate or feel superior to her.

i like nice guys, and i know a lot of girls do. if you find girls that don't like you for being a gentleman then they are probably not long-term relationship potential and not worth it. unless your into the slutty type. just kidding. im sure you wont have any trouble finding someone soon. ;)

i like nice guys, and i know a lot of girls do. if you find girls that don't like you for being a gentleman then they are probably not long-term relationship potential and not worth it. unless your into the slutty type. just kidding. im sure you wont have any trouble finding someone soon. ;)

I can be the same way. I'm fine once I get comfortable in a relationship, but in those beginning stages, I wonder sometimes if I try too hard.

i would really hate to see a nice guy like you turn *******-ish bc u want girls to like you. Dont change for anyone, someone will come along and love you for who you are. You dont want someone to like you for someone your not.

Stay nice! Don't change that. As for the clingy-ness, relax and find other things to do with your time if you are dating someone. Go read, hang out with your buddies, take a walk, find a hobby. There should be other things that fill your time.<br />
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You sound very young. What I can tell you is that young women in American culture have changed big time! Many are coniving and manipulative and many don't know what they want. Consider slightly older young women and think about where you are meeting these girls. If you have a nice church or you join some type of interesting group, you'll at least find people who may be interesting and have the same interests as yourself. Just don't stop being nice. The world doesn't need any more sleeze-buckets!