Where Are The Single Young Women

I am 52, and have been told many times that I don't look that old.
It has been five years since my divorce. I have tried what seems
to be most all the singles web sites, am not into the bar thing.
Women near my age are either married or in some sort of
Two years ago I had a relationship with a woman for several
months, and last year dated a woman for five months. Both
women where bitter and angry with there previous relationships.
Whether most women react that way, or maybe I should have
made wiser decisions.
I live in Minnesota, and travel the state enough to see what is
out there when it comes to young women catching my eye.
I am unsure about approaching these  women because of
my age. What to do,what to do.


dekepetrol41 dekepetrol41
3 Responses May 24, 2012

With all due respect, that is so typical of a lot of 51-55 year old men on social media sites: "...women where bitter and angry with there previous relationships."
What happened to those women who were bitter and angry? Did you bother to ask? Did you talk to them? Were they cheated on and lied to? Did their ex beat them up? Was their former spouse an upstanding, loyal man? Most likely, not. We were not born bitter. We don't want to be bitter. We were born with innocence and then raised in a male dominated society that trained us to be "good girls" and caretakers to everyone. The reason MOST women your age are bitter and angry is because of the way a man or men have treated them. As you must know at your age, women and men think quite differently (and often with different heads--if you know what I mean). We have hormones and instincts that make us emotional, nurturing, a bit more gullible, etc. It wasn't until about a year ago that I even understood the vast differences between how men and women think--I was seriously taken aback. I read two books written by men so I could try to have a better understanding. Have you ever picked up a book written by a woman to try to understand what we feel and think? How we operate? From my experience, men who say things like you just posted, do not even think about that. Also, they can't seem to accept the outer appearance of women their age, despite the fact that men you age have the same wrinkles, droops, sags, etc. I will be honest with you, it is hurtful. I am a strong, young-at-heart, kind and frankly, very attractive woman. I have no problems getting dates with men your age or men half your age. However, I will not date a man half your age because there would be nothing there but SEX. I do not want to hurt a younger man by having a relationship with him, knowing full well I am in it just to get off, and then dump him when I am bored/not interested/don't understand anything about him because of the huge generational gap. I'm not just saying this in theory, it happened. But, I did not know the man was 27 because he lied to me and told me he was 35 (still, even too young). I really hurt him. I will never do that again. And it happens much more so when it is an older man and a younger woman. It seems like certain men your age don't even think about what might happen, and jump right in penis first without any thought of how it might turn out. Most women don't think like you. Most women don't think, well, I'll just let him (blank) me so I can get off. No strings. No commitment. I can also (blank_) other men--I have no responsibility to this person, etc. We have been raised to be "good" girls--remember? I apologize for ranting, I just want to get my point across. This type of attitude to women my age is selfish, immature, offensive, rude, and in a way, perverse. It is a huge turn off. But I will say this, I try and will continue to try NOT to be bitter and angry despite all of the BS I put up with in my life because 1) I don't want to feel hurt and bitter and angry--who does? 2) I don't want men my age to feel that way-but please try to understand my point. Women my age THANK YOU! :)

Young women will be sceptical but you can overcome that if you are genuinely seeking more than a free ride.. young women are just people like anyone else.. so technically speaking its no different approaching a young woman and an old! There is always a chance young or old that you wont be there type but you don't know til you ask.. so ask..
Re older women having baggage... someone MY age once said to me you don't get to be our age without some baggage.. and he took the view you just accept it on both sides.. But young women, (and men!) can have issues too.. confidence is one.. as in lack of.. and some may have had a rotten childhood... their friends might not accept you.. they might have very different needs sexually and emotionally and want to go out clubbing every night while you want to watch tv. or vice versa
Life comes with no guarantees.. we can but try

I'm 65, living in Thailand and I'm seeing a divorced single mom who is 46. The women here usually prefer a man who is at least 10 years older. Age differences of 20-30 years is not uncommon.

I lived overseas as well: Greece, Spain, and the Philippines. I have spoken to many women in third world countries, and they say they prefer older men because they can support them and their families, will always look at them as young and beautiful so they are less likely to cheat, and are (sometimes) kind. It is not the really about the sex. Most of these women have admitted that they wish they could be with a man their age in some ways: passion, health and carefree/spontanious, looks, and also to be with a man from their own country/race (if the man is of a different race). And lets be honest, most of the men that end up with these younger girls are white and from wealthy countries. I saw it over and over and over every day in the Philippines. A 16-17 year old beautiful bar girl walking down the street with a 55-60 year old man hand in hand. To me, it is kind of a bitter sweet thing. It is wonderful that the young woman and her family will have food, clothing, shelter, etc. On the other hand, I know that these very young girls didn't dream of being with someone their grandfather's age. And I'm am not saying this to offend you, or anyone else--it's just the truth in many cases (your age difference is only 10, not 30-40). However, these young women usually devote themselves to their husband/boyfriend because they are so grateful for their help and giving. I also want to point out that I understand why men your age dream of/want/have a much younger woman--they are, because they were only born 15-20-25 years ago, more PHYSICALLY beautiful. And men are visual creatures filled with testosterone. I get it. But, as I pointed out in an earlier post, to women my age/your age, men that actually want a much younger woman (15-20-30 years younger) are immature and just don't really "get life" or try to understand women. It makes us sometimes sad, angry, hurt, etc. because it is obvious that men our age who want a younger woman, still look at women as a possession or piece of beautiful jewelry--like the only thing we have to offer--that matters-- is our physical beauty; not intelligence or maturity, or commonalities due to being from the same generation. The best words I can think of to describe the feeling it can give us is disrespected and unappreciated. We got fat and stretch marks because we bore, nurtured and raised your children. We made your dinner and cleaned your house, and washed your clothes, and handled the finances, and so forth. Then you take off with a 309 something. I'd love to get a reply from a man my age. I'm very curious what our point of view is on what I said. I'm trying to make a point--do you get it? And if I missed any reasons why some older men want a younger woman, I am interested in your opinion. Thank you.