Soberness...Sooo i dont do drugs or anything anymore. It has been 32 days infact.
But im off my meds now for being bi polar because i dont have a job
to pay for them. My moods are starting to become all out of wack
because of this. Im reallly really struggling to stay sober.
Alot of people dont understand the concept of
being an alcoholic addict, so please dont criticize this story if you dont.
I live with my parents still, only 18. Still in school.
I see a chemical dependency counselor 2 times a week usually. but the
appts are usually right after another in the week soo what the hell am
i supposed to do the rest of the week when i am about to relapse?
This Borderline Personality Disorder crap doesnt help either.
I want to Use some sort of drug sooo bad but i dont want to let
anyone down. Everyone is counting on me this time.
I been to treatment twice and im finally getting sober so there
really excited but its one of the hardest things i have ever done..
i keep having dreams of me relapsing. without evven knowing it.
and i wake up thankful i didnt. there is pills and airduster in my house
which neither are my drug of choice but if your an addict and you wanna
get that high you usually arent picky, soooo i just dont wanna